Truthfulness

If all kinds of random impure egoistic thought activities in all the minds in this world are being exposed as they are, one will see that there's very little or even no truthfulness in all kinds of worldly ties and connections, social relationships and interactions, worldly affairs, dealings, and activities, except in silence, devoid of selfless restless modification of the mind, or when the mind is free from the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities, and restlessness.

Truthfulness is just what it is. Neither good nor bad. Neither hurtful nor non-hurtful.

Similarly, what is going on in the mind, of all kinds of random impure restless thought activities/desires/actions/reactions/feelings/emotions/ideas/impurities/wild imaginations/subjective partial incomplete distorted memories of the past, is also neither good nor bad, neither hurtful nor non-hurtful.

However, truthfulness appears to be something hurtful, disturbing, unpleasant, inappropriate, or something contributes to disharmony among all and everyone, when the mind is under the influence of the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities, and restlessness, where all kinds of worldly ties, connections, and relationships cannot survive, or wouldn't be peaceful and harmonious, under the presence of truthfulness of what is going on in all minds that are functioning under the influence of the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities, and restlessness.

As all kinds of impure egoistic ties, connections, and relationships in the world of ignorance and egoism are largely existing or surviving on the absence of truthfulness, or the presence of untruthfulness, of hypocrisy, secrets, made up stories, fairy tales, manipulations, or lies, powered by survival instinct, possessiveness, selfishness, desire, greed, pride, and fear.

Only the minds that understand what is going on in themselves, that are free from ignorance, that are not being determined or disturbed by all kinds of mind perceptions or experiences that are pleasant or unpleasant, agreeable or disagreeable, and desirable or undesirable, can accept all minds as they are, being truthful or untruthful, without attachment, identification, desire of craving and aversion, judgment, and expectation, and thus, can be in peace and harmony while engaging in worldly ties, connections, and relationships with other minds, regardless of whether under the presence or absence of truthfulness or untruthfulness in all kinds of human's interaction and affair. It doesn't matter.

Minds that don't understand what is going in themselves, that are under the influence of ignorance, would be determined or disturbed by all kinds of mind perceptions or experiences, where they cannot accept all minds as they are, under the influence of attachment, identification, desire of craving and aversion, judgment, and expectation, and would be peaceless or disharmonious while engaging in any kind of worldly ties, connections, and relationships with other minds, regardless of whether under the presence or absence of truthfulness or untruthfulness. The mind will be disturbed or hurt by either truthfulness, or untruthfulness, that it doesn't like, doesn't desire and doesn't agree with.

While truthfulness, or untruthfulness, as well as what is going on in the mind, is just what it is. It doesn't disturb or hurt anyone, or doesn't contribute to disharmony among all and everyone, when the mind is devoid of the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities, and restlessness.

All kinds of yoga and meditation practice served the purpose of eradicating the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities, and restlessness from the perceptive cognitive intellectual emotional thinking and acting mind that is selfless and impermanent, that enabling the mind to know or understand what is going on in itself, or knowing Thyself, and hence, be free from ignorance and the ignorant thinking/understanding/behavior/action and reaction that hurt oneself and/or others and the surrounding environment.

Imperfection and all kinds of impurities in the minds are nothing wrong. It is neither good nor bad. It is merely what all impure egoistic minds are. However, the minds that are under the influence of ignorance and egoism, would be determined and disturbed by the imperfection or impurities in themselves and/or in others.

It's like the truth of this fleshy physical body under the 'beautiful' skin is neither good nor bad. If the physical body of all the flesh, bones, ligaments, tendons, blood vessels, veins, nerves, internal organs, secretions, pus and waste products is being exposed without the protective outer layer of 'beautiful' skin, most minds will perceive the physical body without the skin as something 'disgusting', and react with feeling very disgusted and unpleasant. But the physical body is just what it is.

Inquire the truth of everything.

Why mental and emotional independence is highly important for mental health

There's nothing wrong with many people would think and believe that mental and emotional dependence in human beings is a genetic inheritance as well as part of the basic instinct that comes along in all human beings since the beginning of conception in the mother's womb. Many people would think and believe that it is abnormal and unhealthy, or even madness, for anyone to be mentally and emotionally independent. That's their freedom of thinking and understanding.

Mental and emotional dependence is conditional. Something that is conditional, it can be modified and changed, or be reversed, to become mental and emotional independence.

We all might have come into the world of human beings with the genetic inheritance and basic instinct of certain degrees of mental and emotional dependence, and it's vary in different people even since very young age, but it is also very obvious that the growing up environment and condition, of how the parents, care takers, and everyone and everything that the child come in contact with, are deeply influencing or conditioning the selfless perceptive cognitive intellectual thinking emotional mind to be in certain way, to think, believe, judge, understand, feel, desire, behave, act and react in certain way, where most people are growing up being encouraged, trained and empowered to be having intense mental and emotional dependence towards the parents, care takers, siblings, relatives, friends, leaders, teachers, employers, 'superior entity', belief and values, as well as towards the surrounding community under different identities, of particular ethnicity, culture, spirituality, religion, nationality, association, organization, or even, political party.

Mental and emotional dependency is a very common values and practice among the many different passionate egoistic thinking and belief in the world.

Out of survival instinct, attachment, identification, fear and possessiveness, many minds think and believe that mental and emotional independence is something terribly bad and wrong, and hence, they themselves dislike and disagree with the idea of developing mental and emotional independence, and they don't like their children, their family and friends, or the members of their specific community identity, to be mentally and emotionally independent, as for them, it means that, they can no longer have the 'power' to be influencing or controlling all and everyone to be and not to be in certain way that they desire it to be, the way that they think and believe how it should be, that would be benefiting them and their certain selfish desire in certain way.

If mental and emotional dependence can be influenced and conditioned in certain way, to be encouraged, trained and empowered to become stronger, then of course, all that can be reversed.

All kinds of mental and emotional related problem and crisis, such as issues with restlessness, dissatisfaction, discontentment, greed, confidence, self-esteem, self-worth, pride, arrogance, shame, guilt, regret, grief, painful sorrow, superiority, inferiority, self-harm, harm others, destructive and hurtful behavior, bully, intimidation, hostility, violence, offensiveness, defensiveness, hurts, mental breakdown, over-whelming emotion, boredom, loneliness, meaninglessness, jealousy, anger and hatred, and etc, are not only deriving from ignorance and egoism, but especially are strongly related to the empowered mental and emotional dependency in the minds, where the mind unwittingly generates clinging, craving and longing towards receiving attention, love, support, companionship, encouragement, motivation, agreement, liking, acknowledgement, recognition, glorification, approval, acceptance, praise and compliment from oneself and others, as well as have aversion towards the absence or non-existence of all these that the mind is constantly craving and longing for, and towards the impermanent changes or the experiences, relationships, interactions, conditions and situations that are not the way that the mind likes, agrees with, and desires.

Even though the state of mind or the state of emotion, is mostly under the influence of hormonal changes and energy levels on top of being determined or influenced by the mind perception of names and forms or experiences, however, the mind can overcome all those influences upon attaining certain degrees of mental and emotional independence. That is liberation.

Very often when the minds are being rebellious and behave in the way that is meant to be disturbing and hurting their parents, their spouse, their lover, their teachers, their leaders, the society, the surrounding environment, or all and everyone and everything that they feel dissatisfied and angry with, deliberately and intentionally, it is because they are not free, as they are always under certain control or restriction of not being able to be themselves, simply the way that they would like to be, to do and say what they would like to do and say, to think what they would like to think, to believe or disbelieve in certain things, to practice or don't practice certain things, to appreciate or don't appreciate certain things, to express or don't express certain things, or merely to just be free, being what they are, as they are, instead of being a hypocrite under certain self-identity and group identity to think, believe, feel, behave, express, desire, act and react in certain way that is according to how all and everyone desire and expect them to be.

People who are struggling with mental health issues, they just need to let go of that hypocrisy that is something very normal and in common among the many different diverse communities in the world, that they themselves might not even aware of that it is 'something' existing in them, and that, it is causing them not being free, that leads to many other unnecessary mental and emotional issues, that gives rise to many unnecessary behavior problems in oneself and into the relationships and interactions with all the others under the 'unfree' and 'dissatisfied' state of mind. That's why people think and believe that they need to unwind or getaway for a few days, or few weeks, or few months, or even, for a few years, which makes them feel so much better about themselves and life existence, even though not many people understand exactly why, or what is the cause of the disturbed state of mind.

That certain degrees of relief from the existing disturbed dissatisfied state of mind coming from being unwind or getaway from 'life', or 'duty and responsibility', or 'family', or 'friends', or 'relationship', or 'work', or 'social network and interaction', or 'social medias', or 'spiritual and religious community', or 'national and political affairs and news', and so on, for certain period of time, is also impermanent, if without knowing what is the cause of the disturbed dissatisfied state of mind, that leads to the disturbing behavior in oneself, constantly hurting oneself and others, either wittingly or unwittingly.

That is because they are able to be free to be what they are, no need to be a hypocrite all the time dealing with many different people under different personal and group identities, during those times when they are being with themselves, or with some others that don't know them personally in life.

People are afraid of letting go hypocrisy, because most of their relationships with all and everyone are built on hypocrisy, and all these 'fragile' relationships built on hypocrisy might be broken or cannot survive under the truth of not being a hypocrite that pleases all and everyone in certain way.

The minds that understand, the minds that are mentally and emotionally independent, they have no fear of being truthful as they are, being free as they are, that they don't need to be a hypocrite or liar to be pleasing anyone that need to be pleased by others under hypocrisy and untruthfulness, who don't like truthfulness that they strongly disagree with and don't desire, that would be offended and broken by truthfulness.

Relationships that built on hypocrisy and untruthfulness don't last long, as there are so much dissatisfaction and tension in such relationships naturally due to the presence of hypocrisy and untruthfulness, and the extreme effort of trying to uphold such hypocrisy and untruthfulness, so that the 'fragile' relationships won't be broken or shattered.

Some people might mistaken having high self-esteem being proud and arrogant as being mentally and emotionally independent. It's definitely not, and if fact, it's a form of mental and emotional dependency, that's why there is the presence of self-esteem of being proud and arrogant coming from attachment and identification towards the existence and possession of certain qualities of names and forms that they like, agree with and desire.

Some people might also mistaken being a bully to be intimidating others as being mentally and emotionally independent. It's not at all, and in fact, it's also a form of mental and emotional dependency, as the mind needs to feel better about itself by bullying and intimidating others.

Mental and emotional independence is about the mind doesn't need to depend on the existence or possession of anyone or anything, of agreeable and desirable ties, connection, relationship, companionship, experience, interaction and activity, of specific belief, values and practice, of love, support, attention, acknowledgement, recognition, approval, agreement, liking, praise and compliment from others, of any qualities of names and forms to be what it is, and to feel good, positive, happy and meaningful, or not. The mental and emotional independent mind is not being influenced or determined by the presence and absence of all kinds of influences or conditions. This mind is able to be peaceful and compassionate under any unforeseen circumstances, or challenging conditions and situations.

The minds that are mentally and emotionally dependent would feel being intimidated or offended by anyone or anything, especially upon the presence of the mind that is mentally and emotionally independent, even when that mind has no intention to be intimidating or offending anyone, but merely being what it is, being free and independent.

Freedom is upmost important. It is equal to peace and harmony in oneself, however, not many people know exactly what is real freedom, and how to attain the ultimate freedom, of the liberation from the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities and restlessness, and the suffering deriving from all that.

That is why the teachings and practice of yoga and buddhism are existing here for the minds, to be reversing the mind behavior pattern under the influence of all those worldly passionate egoistic influences and conditions since conception, and even more so, during early childhood and adolescence, young adulthood and later adulthood, and even after entering middle age and old age, where many minds are continuously being influenced and conditioned by the many inputs and ideas coming from everyone and everywhere, either wittingly or unwittingly.

Certain degrees of mental and emotional independence is highly important for the mind to be able to renounce the worldly passionate egoistic thinking, belief, values, practice, ideas, affairs, family ties and connections, relationships, interactions and activities, to be observing dispassion, silence, seclusion and solitude, to be performing self-inquiry towards the truth of everything, and towards what is the 'I', that the thinking in the mind that thinks and believes and identifies as itself, or a permanent independent individual self-existence, holding a self-image under certain way of living, thinking, belief, values and practice, physical appearance, mental and emotional traits, physical and mental ability and disability, different types of background, association, accomplishment and status, and specific personality and characteristic, that comes with many different personal and group identities under all kinds of qualities and different names and forms at the same time or in different timing.

The mind will attain real freedom that comes under correct understanding and self-control, be free from all kinds of suffering deriving from the idea of 'I', ignorance, egoism, impurities and restlessness, upon knowing Thyself.

The minds that know Thyself, that are mentally and emotionally independent, they are void of the sense of meaninglessness or loneliness.

Inquire the truth of everything.

Not playing the game that empowers egoism and ignorance

Life is not always easy, and can be quite hard at certain time, where many of those unnecessary uneasiness and hardship are the by-products deriving from the ignorance and egoism of the prideful selfish human beings, that can be avoided if more minds, especially those who have the capability and opportunity to be the leaders or influencers in the world, are free from the influence of ignorance and egoism, which is unfortunately not the case in this world.

It's understandable that out of survival instinct, many people would just play along with the egoistic game of diplomacy and grouping, that is built on hypocrisy and identification that empowers ignorance, egoism, selfishness, possessiveness, separateness and all kinds of discrimination, in order to avoid certain 'difficulties', and be able to enjoy a life that is less 'hard' by being compliant towards many 'human made rules and regulations created out of selfishness' that don't necessarily make life any easier but more complicated.

If one gives in to the unnecessary difficulty and complication that derived from the ignorance and egoism in the world, and desire to be enjoying a slightly easier living condition while being existing in this world of ignorance and egoism, where one plays along with the game of ignorance and egoism, that empowers attachment, identification, desire, comparison, judgment and expectation, then not only that one is not helping the world to be a better place for all beings non-discriminatively, to have less corrupted thinking, belief, actions and reactions, but one is empowering the system that is created out of the ignorance and egoism of human beings, that gives rise to ongoing unnecessary corruptions, difficulties, hardships, damages and suffering in the world.

All kinds of talking and activism about spreading awareness about 'peace in the world', 'non-discrimination', 'all lives matter', 'non-violence', 'corruption free government', 'clean and fair justice and democracy', 'environmental friendly ecological clean way of living', 'vegetarianism', 'veganism', and so on, might help to relieve certain degrees of human made damages in the world, but it doesn't eliminate the source of all kinds of human made problems and damages deriving from the highly corrupted 'system', if the minds are not free from ignorance and egoism, where everyone is playing along with the game of egoism, supporting and empowering the 'system' that derived from and empowers selfishness, pride, attachment, identification, possessiveness, separateness and discrimination, either wittingly or unwittingly.

If a nation will only grant a person a citizenship, if one speaks their particular language proficiently and live life according to their national and cultural belief, values and practice, that one is being proud of being one of them, that one will support, promote and defend their particular political ideas, visions and values, that one has to know their national anthem and the past history of their governmental leaders and affairs, where they cannot accept one as it is, where one doesn't necessarily speak their particular language, doesn't necessarily live life according to their national and cultural belief, values and practice, is not having any attachment and identification or pride towards a national or community or family identity, is not interested in any political ideas and values, doesn't know their national anthem or any other national anthems, and is not interested in the past history of any governmental leaders and affairs in the world that are nothing but the product of egoism and the fuel that feeds egoism, then 'I' am not interested in attaining such citizenship, even though 'I' respect the action and decision of such human beings won't grant someone their particular national citizenship under such 'egoistic conditions, rules and regulations', that's their freedom of thinking, belief, values and action, but 'I' am not playing the game of ignorance and egoism in order to attain any particular citizenship that might or might not make life less difficult.

Being a 'rightful' citizen of any particular nation in the world of corruption, doesn't necessarily mean that there will be less difficulty or suffering in life existence arising from the ignorance of human beings. The situation in the world right now, in this present moment, and at anytime, is indeed the greatest teacher of the mind. One doesn't need to go anywhere in search for a teacher to teach oneself about ignorance and the consequences of ignorance. This world of human beings is full of ignorance and the consequences of ignorance.

Not speaking any particular language proficiently, not living life according to any particular national and cultural belief, values and practice, not having any attachment and identification or pride towards any national or community or family identity, not interested in any political ideas and values that empowers separateness and selfishness, not knowing any national anthem, and not interested in the past history of any governmental leaders and affairs that empowers possessiveness and greed, it doesn't mean that one is not respecting all kinds of lives, or one is being disrespectful towards other people's different ways of living in accordance to a particular national and cultural belief, values and practice, or one will be intentionally creating unnecessary problems, damages and inconvenience to other people in the society, or one won't be kind and helpful towards other beings unconditionally, or one won't be looking after the general welfare of all and everyone non-discriminatively in the world of diversity, regardless of the different names and forms.

Unless the policy of a country is not at all about welcoming peaceful human beings that embrace peace and harmony among all and everyone non-discriminatively, that would help and be kind towards one another unselfishly, that welcome world peace or universal peace without possessiveness, selfishness, discrimination, hatred, bully and violence, but it's more about having their own particular political demands and agendas, to be 'recruiting' supporters and manpower that would be empowering and defending their 'power and wealth status' and 'possessions', then let it be. They want human beings that are aggressive and violent, that will fight for them to accomplish their selfish greedy ambition of conquering and possessing more and more territories and natural resources via bullying, threat, force and violence, to boost their status of power and wealth. Human beings who want peace and harmony are useless to them. Many of the people in certain nations are being manipulated by such ignorant egoistic leaders and influencers to become more and more selfish, self-righteous, self-protective, discriminating, hating and violent, where they are not interested at all in the peace and harmony among all diversities in the world, or to be looking after the welfare of all and everyone in the world of diversities non-discriminatively, but only to enhance and protect the welfare of themselves and those whom they refer as one of them.

Similarly, within a personal relationship or a family relationship, one will not be playing the game of diplomacy and grouping, empowering the ignorance and egoism in oneself and others.

The game of diplomacy and grouping is being seen as the way to develop and maintain peace and harmony within the personal relationship, the family and the society, where one is being told to keep the head down and be silent towards any forms of ill-treatment unto oneself and/or others, but that's only encouraging and empowering ignorance and corruption in the world on all levels.

Not being determined or disturbed by the ignorance of others in the world, or not fighting against the ignorance in the world, doesn't mean that one should be submissive and silent towards all kinds of ill-treatment, not walking away from such abusive situations when there's possibility to do so, and being there allowing oneself and/or others to be ill-treated by some others repeatedly and continuously, encouraging and empowering the ignorance of others.

Don't want to hurt other people's feelings?

Some people say that "hurting other people's feelings" is not their culture. They will not want to hurt anyone's feelings. They don't really appreciate straightforwardness, honesty and truthfulness. They prefer not to express how they feel or what they think (especially it's some negative comments, thinking and feelings,) in front of people, and they will always say nice things like, "You're very good. Thank you." even when they don't think or feel like that at all, but they will complain behind people's backs about they are not good.

They think and believe that by that way, they are free from hurting anyone's feelings at all.

The point is, if we truly don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, we should not have any negative or bad thinking, feelings, actions and speech at all (even behind other people's back or knowledge). Then we won't need to be untruthful or dishonest, nor have to be hypocrite and tell lies in front of anyone, nor will we say or do anything that will hurt anyone, whether directly or indirectly, whether in front of people or behind people's back.

Unless our mind is completely be free from impurities such like craving and aversion, anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, pride, arrogance, animosity and fear that arise from egoism and attachment towards certain personal beliefs and cultural practice, or attachment towards the qualities of names and forms that we like and dislike, agree and disagree with. Or else we won't be free from hurting somebody's feelings at some points.

If we are aware of our mind is not pure and is being over-powered by some bad and negative thoughts or feelings about other people, but we can have self-control not to do or say anything that will hurt them whether directly or indirectly, whether in front of them or behind their backs, then we can say that we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings even though there are some negative thoughts and feelings arising and passing away in our mind. We observe these thoughts and let them go, without attachment nor judgment, without reaction nor expression through actions and speech.

How can we say "I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings... Hurting other living beings is not my culture." when we are over-powered by anger and hatred towards certain people's personality, behavior and actions that we strongly disagree with, and we criticize them and condemn these people to hell, and wish that they will suffer for what they have done?

As well as whether what kind of actions and speech that will hurt other people's feelings or not, has no particular standards that fit all. It depends on individual personality, perception about things, and how they react towards what they perceive. Some people easily get offended and feel hurt by what they perceive as 'not right', 'not nice', 'not good', offensive, or insult, even though nobody say or do anything that seems to be offensive or hurtful.

Those who have transcended egoism and names and forms will not be hurt by any forms of thoughts, actions and speech.

It depends on ourselves, our perception of things, our reactions towards what we perceive, the purity of our mind, to determine whether our feelings will be hurt by anybody's actions or speech. Usually when our feeling is hurt by certain actions or speech, is because those actions and speech is something that we (the ego) dislike and disagree with. Those actions and speech has no quality or power to hurt us unless we perceive them as something 'hurtful', and give them the quality and power to hurt us.

Om shanti.