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May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Free ourselves from anger and hatred, if we would like to contribute to world peace and harmony...

We cannot make or control or change the world to be peaceful as what we like it to be, but we can contribute to the effort for attaining/sustaining world peace and harmony, by having peace and harmony in ourselves, which means letting go of anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, dissatisfaction, disappointment, pride, arrogance, agitation, depression, fear, worry and all other impurities in ourselves and stop generate impurities into the world... The world will be in peace and harmony naturally when everyone is peaceful and harmony in themselves...

It is like, we don't like the environment to be dirty with rubbish everywhere, we want a clean world, but we keep generating and throwing rubbish into the environment and we complain that the environment is dirty, full of rubbish?

How can we expect the world to be in peace and harmony when we ourselves are not in peace and harmony?

Why are we not in peace and harmony? It is because our ego has likes and dislikes, agreements and disagreements, craving towards what our ego likes and agrees with, aversion towards what our ego doesn't like and doesn't agree with... When this craving and aversion is not being gratified, when our ego comes in contact with the things that it doesn't like and doesn't agree with, and when our ego doesn't come in contact with the things that it likes and agrees with, it gets irritated, frustrated, disappointed, dissatisfied, unhappy and angry... The mind is in a state of restlessness... There is no peace, no compassion, no wisdom... Due to ignorance (absence of wisdom), not knowing the truth of things, we allow ourselves to be disturbed, affected, influenced and determined by our experiences in the world that our ego likes and doesn't like, agrees and disagrees with...

To help and to contribute to world peace and harmony, it is not necessarily by performing "actions" that try to "clean up" or get rid of the existing happenings that we think and judge as "bad" and "evil", but most important it is, we ourselves purifying the impurities in our own mind, have self-control over our own thoughts, actions and speech, and stop generating "impure" thoughts, actions and speech through our own body and mind... It is not about try to stop other people from performing "bad" and "evil" thoughts, actions and speech, or try to control and change other people to behave the way that we think they should be behaving, or to be the people that we want them to be...

When we ourselves are full of impurities, are being over-powered by our own impure thoughts, actions and speech, how can we expect or try to change the world to be free from impurities?

It is like, we don't like it when our clean shirt is spilled with some curry sauce, we'll get frustrated and upset, and we'll react by try to get rid of the curry sauce by wiping it with a clean cloth, with the intention to remove the stain... But, what happens is, the curry sauce on the clean shirt spreads out to a wider surface makes it more messy, as well as the clean cloth that is being used to "remove" the curry sauce is also stained by the curry sauce...

To avoid this, either we eat the curry with full attention and carefully to avoid spilling onto ourselves or other people (concentration and mindfulness), or we can enjoy eating curry with an apron over our clean shirt or wear a shirt that we don't mind if it will be stained (wisdom), or we don't mind at all if the clean shirt will be stained by some curry sauce, it doesn't matter if the shirt will be stained or not (accepting the reality as it is and non-attachment), or we can eat something else that doesn't stain or wash the shirt later on without getting frustrated by it (adjustment, accommodation, adaptation)...

There's another situation is like, we didn't eat curry, but the person beside us ate curry and spilled some curry sauce over our "favorite" shirt whether intentionally or unintentionally, and that's the time for us to practice accepting the reality as it is, forgiveness, letting go and compassion... We cannot undo something that had happened... Even if we express our dissatisfaction and frustration with anger and hatred, it won't undo what had happened, it won't help to make the situation to become better, it won't benefit anyone, not us, not the shirt, not the one who had spilled the curry sauce over our "favorite" shirt...

What we can do is, without frustration and unhappiness, we can see if the stain can be remove by some washing liquids... If it is possible, good, we can continue enjoy wearing our favorite shirt... If it is not possible, either we can let go of the stained shirt or we can continue to wear it even if there's a stain on it, treat it as a special design... Or donate the shirt to many countries where people don't even have a proper shirt to wear... Why bother getting upset about it, harming our own body and mind, for somebody's ignorant action whether intentionally or unintentionally?

If we continue to be angry and unhappy about it, know that this anger and unhappiness is not coming from the action of that person, nor it is coming from the incident about the shirt is stained by some curry sauce... It is coming from our own ego attached strongly to that shirt, it is the attachment towards this is "my favorite shirt", that has caused that anger and unhappiness in us... Imagine if that shirt is just a shirt that we don't mind so much, we won't be as angry as the one which is "my favorite shirt"... It is our own attachment towards the things that we like, that causes us unhappiness, it is not what is happening, or what other people do...

If somebody's things are being damaged by accident or by carelessness or by natural disaster, we won't be reacting the same way as if it is "my" things that are being damaged... It is the attachment towards "I", "my" and "mine" that has caused us unhappiness, anger and hatred...

"This is my world, my country, my people, my family, my friends, my partner, my children, my house, my car, my shirts, my things, my jobs, my reputation, my feelings, my money, my effort, my intention, my students, my teacher, my practice, my achievements, my thinking, my opinions, my believe, my rights, my freedom, my success, my failure, my sadness, my happiness, my way of doing things, it's all about my, my, my..." But when come to something happens and we are not happy about it, it will become "You this... you that... he this... he that...they this... they that..."

Yoga and meditation practice is to allow us to realize the truth of what causes us unhappiness and suffering, and start to take full responsibility for our own happiness and unhappiness... It is not the world making us unhappy or unpeaceful... It is our own selves, our attachment, our ego, our pride and arrogance, our ignorance that cause us unhappiness and unpeacefulness...

The world is not a suffering place nor a happy place... The world is just being what it is... It is our own mind being in a state of suffering due to ignorance, and we project the world as a suffering place...

If everyone can look within ourselves and work on removing ignorance in ourselves, purifying our own thoughts, actions and speech, and stop trying to control other people's good and bad actions (you should do this and you should not do this), naturally the world will be benefited and be peaceful and harmony...

By stop generating impure vibrations into the world, the world will be free from impurities, and there is no need actions of "cleaning up"... As actions of "cleaning up" are not necessarily helping the world to be peaceful but it might be generating more unrest, anger and hatred... Especially "actions" that derived or motivated from anger and hatred towards the happenings and people that we think they are the cause for our suffering and unhappiness, will not help the world to be better but it generates more tensions and clashes into the world causing more anger, hatred and disharmony...

How can we expect the world to be a happy peaceful place if we ourselves are not happy and not peaceful, being over-powered and occupied by resentment, anger, hatred, dissatisfaction and disappointment?

We think and judge ourselves as "good people". We think and judge those who are different from us, who don't think and behave like us are "bad people". We have strong aversion towards all these "bad people" and "bad happenings". We are angry and hating these "bad people" and "bad happenings". We think we "own" this world, that this world "belongs" to us (the "good people") and we want "our" world to be free from all these "bad people" and "bad happenings"... And we try to perform some actions that can get rid of all these "bad people" and "bad happenings"... With the expectations that the world will become as "clean" and "nice" as what we want it to be...

We think that it is the world being not peaceful that makes or causes us disharmony and unpeacefulness, that our suffering and unhappiness is contributed by the "bad happenings" and "bad people" in the world. We think that we are "good people" who "do" many "good actions", "don't do" any "bad actions" and we deserve to be happy and peaceful, but those (the "bad people") who are different from us don't deserve to be happy and don't deserve to be in this world...

We felt disappointed, mistreated, betrayed, hurt, disturbed and threatened by "bad" people and happenings that we don't like, don't want and don't agree with... We think they (the bad people) should be punished or disappeared from "our" world, so that we can be peaceful and happy, or "our" world will be peaceful and harmony...?

All these "judgments" and "thinkings" coming from our own minds, make us not any different from the "bad people" who we think and judge that they are "bad"... What make us qualified to judge them as "bad people" when we are not different from them? And if we are perfect and qualified to judge anyone, we won't be judging anyone anymore...

We cannot change the world to be the way that we want it to be, but we can contribute to help the world to be a better place by changing ourselves...

Stop having anger and hatred, but fill ourselves and the environment with peace and compassion... Real peace and compassion is free from anger and hatred, free from discrimination, likes and dislikes, agreement and disagreement... If we think that we are compassionate people who try to make the world a better place, but we are angry and hating the "bad" people and happenings that we think they are the cause of the world's suffering and unpeacefulness, then that is not compassion at all...

Compassion is when we are aware of what is good and what is bad, we do good and don't do bad, but we accept that there are other beings that are different from us, who might not do good and might do bad... This doesn't mean that we agree with them or support them... But we don't have to be affected or disturbed by them... We don't have to get angry and have hatred towards them as this is only harming our own body and mind, but doesn't help to improve anything nor will stop them from doing what they are doing...

Out of wisdom, we know that some beings don't do good and do bad, are due to ignorance, and they are in suffering. They are not peaceful and not happy, that's why they reluctant to do good, and they do bad to try to attain some sort of excitement, happy sensations or satisfaction, to get rid of suffering, dissatisfaction and unhappiness...

Out of compassion, we are compassionate towards these beings that are over-powered by ignorance and who are in suffering...

We cannot change other people or control them to be the way that we want them to be, or to behave the way that we want them to behave... Everyone has to realize peace and compassion within themselves, remove ignorance and change themselves...

Ask ourselves, how do we feel and react, when somebody doesn't like us the way that we are, doesn't agree with what we think and do, and this person try to control or change us to be the way that he/she wants us to be? We won't be happy... Especially if this person is full of anger and hatred towards us, shouting at us, beating us, just because he/she wants us to be the way that he/she wants... We will fight back with resentment...

We can only change ourselves... When we ourselves changed and have love, peace, wisdom and compassion, then only we can help the world with this unconditional peace and compassion to help other beings to realize the unconditional love, peace, wisdom and compassion in themselves through their own effort and own will to change themselves, to free themselves from ignorance and suffering... When they are free from ignorance and suffering, when they are in peace and harmony, they will be naturally not doing any actions that will cause harm and disharmony into the world...

If we are peaceful and truly compassionate, we won't be affected nor disturbed nor influenced by other people's ignorance and suffering, and out of compassion and with wisdom, we can help them, by helping them to realize their own ignorance and be free from suffering... Without the expectation that they will be benefited by our "actions of helping", nor they will change due to our "actions of helping", nor they will be grateful or thankful for our "actions of helping"... Just perform our "actions of helping" and let go... Perform all our actions out of compassion, and not attach to our actions, not attach to the result or the fruit of our actions...

If we are being affected or disturbed or influenced by other people's ignorance and suffering, we cannot help anyone, as we ourselves are over-powered by ignorance and are in suffering... We cannot help the world to be free from anger and hatred when we ourselves is full of anger and hatred... We cannot help the world to be peaceful when we ourselves is not in peace...

When we are angry and unhappy, it is our own responsibility allowing ourselves to be over-powered by anger and unhappiness that derive from our own ignorance - not knowing the truth of things. It is not the people or the happenings out there that cause us anger and unhappiness... It is our ego, our pride and arrogance, our attachment towards the qualities of good and bad, our ignorance that cause us being miserable, upset, disappointed, frustrated, angry, hating, agitated, disturbed, depressed and so on... We were being conditioned and controlled by our own craving and aversion... It is this craving and aversion coming from our ego that causes us suffering, disappointment, unpeacefulness and unhappiness...

If we ever feel disrespected or insulted or intimidated by somebody's speech, actions, reactions, opinions, behavior, conducts, believes, performance or personality, it is coming from our own ego, pride and arrogance which exists side by side with low self-esteem...

For example, if i hear or read about some opinions that my ego doesn't like or doesn't agree with, there will be some reactions coming from my ego...
Either my ego will choose to :
- Attach to it and try to do something about it, but being unpeaceful, full of frustration and anger, be disturbed and affected by it...
- Or attach to it and try to do something about it, but peacefully without being disturbed by it...
- Or not attach to it and let it go, be in peace undisturbed by it, as everyone has their freedom to express their opinions which are different from or contradict with my opinions...

It is up to myself, my own choice and responsibility, if the ego choose to be disturbed and be unhappy or frustrated about something that it doesn't like and cannot agree with, and make a huge debate or drama out of it, trying to convince and prove that my opinions are superior, better and "right", and any other opinions that are contradicted and different from mine are inferior, less good and "wrong"...

Or I can be aware that my ego doesn't like it and cannot agree with it, I don't have to force myself to like it or agree with it, but I can respect and allow any other opinions that are different from mine to be co-exist with my opinions in this universe... I don't own or possess this universe, I respect and allow all and everything that is different from my way of thinking, opinions, speech, actions, reactions, behavior, conducts, believes, performance or personality to be exist in this same space of the universe along with "me" and "my" way of everything...

Or I can be aware that my ego doesn't like it and cannot agree with it, I don't have to force myself to like it or agree with it, but out of compassion, without getting unhappy or frustrated, I can do my best to share my opinions with the world, as I believe my opinions might can help the world to improve, to be better, but without the expectation that the world will be improved or changed to be the way that I think it should be...

Why upset ourselves, hurting and harming our own body and mind by somebody's opinions and behaviors that my ego doesn't like or doesn't agree with? I did the "good' and "right" thing and didn't do anything "bad" or "wrong" according to what I believe is good or bad, right or wrong, but why do I allow myself to be hurt and harmed by other people's opinions and behaviors that are according to what my mind believes is bad or wrong?

We cannot force anyone to be the same like us... We cannot expect other people to behave the same way like us... We cannot change or control other people to think, speak, act and react the same way like us...

If we ever felt angry and disappointed by somebody's behavior, we are actually being angry and disappointed by our own expectation towards other people, that we expect them to be behaving like this or like that... When they don't behave the way according to what we think they should be behaving, we get angry and unhappy... It is not the behavior of the people that has disappointed us or made us angry... We are selfish... We want to control everything to be the way that we like it to be...

We were hurt, upset and disappointed by our own selfishness and ignorance, when we try to control or change other people to think, to speak, to behave, to act, to react the way that we would like or want them to think, to speak, to behave, to act, to react... And if they don't, we will feel hurt, upset and disappointed... And this turn into frustration and anger... We get frustrated and angry, being agitated and unhappy, thinking that it is other people's "misbehavior" that is disturbing us and is causing us unhappiness and unpeacefulness, and want to make or change or control other people to behave the way that we like and agree with... And we'll get more frustrated and unhappy as we cannot control or change anyone other than changing ourselves...

We are hurt and disappointed by our own selfishness as we cannot allow other people to be different from us... We want "our" world to be the way that we want it to be... We "expect" other people also will have the same ideas and desires for the world to be "the way that we like it to be"... When other people don't show co-operation to make the world the way that we want it to be, we get frustrated, angry and hating towards these people that we think they are "selfish" because they don't want to give support to our "mission", or they don't go along with our "brilliant" ideas and believes... We ourselves is being selfish but we judge other people who are different from us and disagree with us as selfish beings...

Do our best for what we think is "good" and "right", and let it go... Have peace, be in peace and share this peace without expecting the world will become peaceful... Allow the result of our "good" and "right" action to come by itself and to be what it is... Stop being angry and hating towards what we think is "not good" and "not right"... Peace will be there when we stop generating resentment and restlessness into the world... The world will be in peace by itself naturally, when we have peace in ourselves...

This is compassion... Just like the sun, the air, the water, the earth and the space... They are always performing the action of giving, providing and supporting to all beings to be exits in the universe... But they have no intention to be giving, no discriminations, no likes and dislikes, no craving and aversion, no anger and hatred, no judgments, no comparisons, no expectations, no identification as the doer of the actions and the enjoyer of the actions, no attachment towards all actions and the fruit of actions...


Real compassion is unconditional...

There's no anger or hatred, no disappointment or unhappiness, if we are truly compassionate...

We will be compassionate towards all beings whether wise or ignorant, rich or poor, good or evil, young or old, happy or unhappy, pure or impure, beings that we agree or disagree with, beings that we like or dislike, no differences...

Be kind and compassionate towards all beings including ourselves is also one of the beings...

Be free from anger and hatred is being kind and compassionate towards ourselves... If we can't even be kind and compassionate towards ourselves, how can we be kind and compassionate towards other beings, and how can we expect other beings to be kind and compassionate towards us?

Forgive ourselves and accept ourselves for being imperfect... Forgive others and accept others for being imperfect... This is compassion towards all beings...

We don't have to agree with "evil and wrong" doings... We are not supporting "evil and wrong" doings... But we don't have to be angry and hating towards evil doings...

Anger and hatred cannot dissolve anger and hatred... Anger and hatred can only be dissolved in compassion... Without compassion, there's no real peace and happiness as we will always be disturbed by what we don't like and disagree with...

Be happy.

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Know thyself. There is no existence of 'I'. Everything is impermanent. Be free, be peaceful, be happy.

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My husband and I run ongoing yoga retreats in Langkawi Malaysia. We teach traditional Hatha Yoga - a combination of Asanas (postures) and Pranayama (breathing techniques) and relaxation, that has given benefit to millions of practitioners over thousands of years. Our yoga studio is situated in Langkawi. We also run yoga retreats in Europe and India.

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