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May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Friday, May 27, 2011

Want to be able to control or to change everything to be the way that we like it to be? Think again...

Though not everyone, but most people feel that we are born to be powerless, limited and not free, because by having this conditional impermanent physical body with the impure mind functioning in this world, experiencing dualism that derives from names and forms, having craving and aversion towards the pleasant and unpleasant experiences, going through many encountering and situations which are not what we like and want, nor what we can agree with and are acceptable. And thus, we feel frustrated, depressed, suffered and unhappy being conditioned and limited by many things that are not in our control as what we think it should be or what we like it to be.

That's why many of us (the ego) wanted to rebel. We (the ego) resist to be limited and conditioned by "things" that are not in our control and "things" that we don't like and don't want. We want everything to be the way as what we want them to be, or else we are not satisfied, not happy, not peaceful whenever we see, or hear, or smell, or taste, or touch, or think about names and forms that we don't agree with, don't like and don't want...

In fact, we think that if we want to be free from being controlled by "things", then what we have to do is, to be able to control "things" to be the way that we like them to be. To be the one who is in power and in charge of "things", instead of "things" being out of our control, which makes us (the ego) feel weak, defeated and insecure.

That's why some people tried to practice some sort of "psychic power" in order to "make" all their wishes come true (good or evil), and they (the ego) will feel - "Yes! We are the one who are in control of everything as what we want them to be..."


We think that if we can "make" other people to be agree with us, to like us and love us, then we will be happy. If some people who we want them to like us, but they don't, we will try to "make" them to like us, or else we are not satisfied. There is nothing wrong with other people to like us, but it should be coming naturally from their own free will, not because we want them to like us, and we'll try to "make" them to like us...

We think that if we don't want to be the loser (the weak one), we have to be the winner (the strong one). We think that we will be free from being "controlled", if we can control "things" to be the way that we like them to be. We want to fight against the law of nature, to stop impermanence. We think that if we don't want to be "bullied" by somebody, we have to "bully" that somebody. But this is incorrect thinking that brings us more tensions, frustration, disappointment, depression, guilt, fear and worry.

Some people tried many ways to fight against the law of nature (impermanence). They wanted to avoid the "suffering" of having a conditional and limited life existence with the function of a mortal physical body that is conditioned by growth, changes, pain, discomforts, injuries, old age, decay, sickness and death... They tried to retain youth, strength and health, and if possible to become "disease-less", "non-decay", and "deathless"...

Even some yogis also tried to "make" this limited adjunct (the mortal physical body that depends on elements and energy to be exist) to become a super human being that can go against the law of nature, to stop aging, to prevent decaying and death...

The result is, we'll get so frustrated and disappointed, because the more we try to control "things" to be the way that we want them to be, and yet "things" are seem to be out of our control... It's because we can't control "things" to be the way that we want them to be. Even enlightened being like Buddha, also didn't want to control anything. If he wanted, or if he could, he would have removed everyone's unhappiness and diseases, and made every beings be enlightened and there would be no more ignorance in everyone, and there would be no more unhappiness and suffering to be existing in the world.

In yoga and meditation, we wanted to attain spiritual enlightenment in order to be free from all the conditions that derive from having a life existence (a physical body being conditioned by birth and death). This actually means, "To attain Samadhi (the complete annihilation of the mind, the intellect and the ego) through deep meditation in order to transcend the wheel of birth and death, and not coming into life existence again of having another impure body with
the mind being "occupying" by ignorance, which is the cause of all suffering. And this "freedom" is nothing to do with challenging the physical body to go beyond its limitations and to become a super human being that can fly, or float, or having psychic power, or can be forever youthful, doesn't get old and decay...

All the practices are there for us to be prepared
(purifying the mind) to meditate and to go into Samadhi (The disappearance of ignorance, impurities, qualities, dualities, names and forms. Synonymous with the annihilation of the mind, the intellect and the ego). But some yogis had attached so much to this physical body and this life existence, and tried to challenge their physical body to go beyond its limitations and conditions, by doing lots of "yoga practices" to try to make the physical body immortal, to go against the law of nature, to become the strongest, the most flexible super human being, and to attain psychic power to manipulate other people to be in their control...

But how is the world going to be like, if everyone practice yoga and meditation, and becomes physically immortal and have psychic power to have all our wishes (whether good or bad) to be materialized?

It will be a complete disaster... We'll have to be very careful of all our thoughts, because every single thought will be materialized (especially coming from an impure mind). It'll be so exhausting and what a huge responsibility...


There are also some people who don't want to fight, or to evolve, or to make any effort to transcend "suffering" or "birth and death". They prefer to indulge in pleasurable sensual enjoyments as much as they can while still living in this world... They don't mind if the world ends now or will end later...

While some other people chose to be depressed and unhappy about everything and have no will power to try to evolve or to transcend "suffering" or "unhappiness"...

There is nothing wrong at all with people who want to transcend "suffering", or people who just want to enjoy life as much as possible, or people who just want to be depressed and unhappy and do nothing about it...

Everyone has the freedom and choice to do what we want to do with our life, our body and mind, our life existence... At least this is one of the things that we think that we are capable to be in control, to make decision, to decide what we want to do and what we want to "be"...


But why do we want to control things? Why do we want to "be" something?

It requires so much effort to try to control "things" and to "be" something... But it doesn't require any effort at all to let go and not to control anything, nor to "be" something.

We ourselves are so unhappy being controlled by other people or being conditioned by "things", but why didn't we think that the people and "things" that we want them to be in our control, will reject to be controlled and be conditioned as well?

We think that if we want to get rid of unhappiness, we need to have happiness. We also think that to have happiness or to be happy means, "things" should be the way that we like them to be, or else we will not be happy or there won't be happiness...

That's why we (the ego) are very unhappy when "things" don't turn out the way as what we like them to be... And thus, we started to think of any ways to "make" all our wishes come true including try to practice psychic power or black magic to control "things" to be what we want them to be... For example, when our lover doesn't love us anymore, but we couldn't accept that the people that used to love us have stopped loving us and are going to leave us, and we'll get so unhappy and will try some "hypnotism" or "black magic" to "make" our lover to "like" and "love" us again by "external force"...

What's the meaning when we want to "possess" somebody who doesn't want to love us, by using hypnotism or black magic to "force" or "make" them "love" us out of their own free will and to "keep" them in our life, doesn't want them to leave us or doesn't want them to love somebody else (we'll get so jealous and angry if somebody who we want them to love us but they don't love us and they love somebody else instead)? It's such an ignorant and crazy idea...


This is one of the plays of the ignorant selfish egoistic mind... And if we are identifying with this ignorant selfish egoistic mind
(being controlled and influenced by it), we have no idea how ignorant we can be when "things" are not what we like them to be, and when we want "things" to be the way that we want them to be...

Even somebody who is very smart and intelligent, and well-educated, will still be over-powered by this selfish egoistic mind, being the slave of the mind that is full of lustful desires and cravings, and will do things that are so ignorant and selfish in order to please this selfish ego, to get what it wants, to get rid of what it doesn't want, to make the ego feels superior, satisfy, to be in power, to be in control, to feel strong, good and happy...


We want to be free to go wherever we wanted to go, to do whatever we wanted to do, to say whatever we wanted to say, and etc... We don't like to be controlled by other people or be controlled by "rules and regulations"... If we ourselves don't want to be controlled by other people of how we should think and feel, how we should live our life, how we should behave, to think, to feel, to express, to walk, to sit, to stand, to talk, to eat, to play, to sleep and etc, then how does other people would feel when we try to control or to change them to be the way that we like them to be?

We think that we are the "good" people that are the one who is contributing to the world, and all other people who are "bad" are the one who is destroying the world...

And we think we have the right to be what we think we should be (to be "good") and other people have no right to be what they want to be (to be "bad")... And we want to change these "bad" people to be as "good" as we are... We think we are the "heroes" that are saving the world from getting worst...


Well, at least we tried to be good and do good. That's nothing wrong with that. But the problem is that we wanted to "change" or to "control" other people who are not the same as us to "be" like us... We think that we are right and they are wrong... But how true is that?

We think that if there is no more "bad" and "evil" people in the world by killing them or locking them in jails or "reprogram" their behaviors, and there will be no more suffering and unhappiness in the world and this will make the world to be peaceful and happy... But how true is that?

The world will still be the same "dissatisfying and imperfect" place for us even when there are no more "bad and evil" people out there, because we (the impure mind) have incorrect thinking even though we try to be good and do good... Ignorance and selfishness are still there in our mind... Anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, agitation, depression, disappointment, dissatisfaction, fear, worry, craving, aversion, attachment are still there in our mind...

It is the mind not at peace, it's not the world being unpeaceful...

We are not peaceful, and we try to make the world peaceful, but we'll be so disappointed because we can't attain peacefulness by making the world "peaceful", because it is our mind not peaceful, not contented and not free...


Wherever we go, we bring along this discontented, selfish, unpeaceful, disturbed, confused, impure mind with us. And we will be unpeaceful being anywhere even at a place where there is not any external disturbance... We (the mind) will be complaining that it is too quiet, too calm, too bored, and we need to have some happenings, excitement, interactions or debates...

The point is, we don't have to control "things" at all...

"Things" never have the intention to control anything. "Things" didn't want to control us at all...

It is us who attached to "things" and be controlled by "things"...

Nature or God doesn't even bother to control anything... Or else it will be so exhausting, isn't it? There is no rest day at all, every moment have to be governing everybody's "business", or else many unwanted "accidents" will be happening everywhere at the same time...

If nature or God is controlling everything, then maybe one day, nature or God, is so tired of governing the universe and to control everything as what they should be, and wants to take a holiday, and appoints one of us, the "super human being" who is the mightiest, smartest and possibly immortal in the world, to be in charge of governing and controlling the entire universe, what will that be like?

It will be a disaster!

We thought it will be so great if we are being given the duty and power to rule the world to be the way that we want it to be... But with an impure ceaseless thinking egoistic mind, we can't even make a small decision without any doubts, guilt, fear and worry, not to say to control the world to be what we want it to be...

Then we will start to think that maybe it is not a good idea at all to be in charge and be able to control everything to be the way that we want them to be...

We think that if the human beings can go against the law of nature and impermanence, and become perfect in life existence, that there will be no decay, no growth, no old age, no sickness, no unpleasant experiences, no pain, no hunger, no thirst, no war, no killings, no unwanted natural disasters, no accidents, no injuries, and no death, and everyone will be living in peace and harmony... But it's not.

Imagine if everyone is immortal and multiplying in population, what will happen to this world?

This universe need the law of impermanence to function smoothly... Old hair need to go, in order for new hair to come out... Finger nails can keep growing if we don't cut them, but they will become very troublesome if we let them continue to grow longer and longer... Old cells dying and disappearing, and new cells being born and growing...


We think that if we have the power to control or to change the world to be the way that we think it should be, and if we can eliminate (by killing or jailing) all the evil minded and bad behavior people in the world, and the world will be in peace and everyone will be happy and peaceful... But it's not.

Imagine if we are the one who is controlling our heart beats and breathing all the time since we were born into this world, we'll be so exhausted and we have to be awake every moment, or else the heart stops beating and the lungs stop breathing...

The world is not "unpeaceful"... It is in our own mind, that we are not at peace...

The world is not "suffering"... It is in our own mind, that we are suffering...

We don't like to be conditioned by the law of nature, of course the nature will not "like" to be conditioned or to be "reconditioned" by us (which we human beings did try to reconditioning everything if possible)...

We think that we are so smart and intelligent to be smarter than the law of nature or God, and interfere with the law of nature and impermanence, but we actually had created great disturbance and disharmony in the universal natural energy fields. The world is getting "sicker" when the human beings had invented so many high-tech conveniences for our worldly living conveniences and life enjoyment that come along with lots of side effects damaging the Eco system of the world...

We thought the world is not in "good form", and we are being so compassionate, we wanted to heal the world to prevent it from getting "worst", and we invented lots of "medicines" or "methods" trying to make the world a better place, but instead the world is getting more "sick", because we are actually interfering with its natural cycle of self-healing process and the law of nature...

Take a look at our own physical body. It has its own natural healing process, if we allow it to be as "natural" as it is...
But we don't. We want to interfere with its natural healing process and natural aging process, and try to put in many external artificial "things" into it, with the intention to make it healthier, stronger, younger, and "age-less" if possible...

Sometimes the physical body feels upset, in pain, having cramps, soreness, fever, cold, coughing, sneezing, vomiting and diarrhea, we thought that our body is "sick" ("somebody" told us that we are sick) and we need to feed it with some "medicine" to cure the sickness. But actually all these symptoms are its own natural healing process to combat diseases. And we purposely fighting with this natural healing process of the body by feeding it with "medicine" that "kills" this natural healing process, and we still think that we are so "smart" and are so kind to take care of the body...

We don't have to control anything, but to let everything to be the way that they naturally should be like... And allow ourselves to be the way that we naturally should be like...

Just be what we are at the present moment now as it is, and not trying to "become" someone or something that we are not at this present moment now. And "this", what we are now, it is also impermanent and is constantly changing, and allow that impermanence and changes to happen naturally...


No fear of old age, decay, sickness or death...

When this body needs to "go", we'll be grateful and let it go in peace...


The moment that we let go of trying to control "things" to be the way that we want them to be (even when we have the good intention of wanting everything to be good), we are free!

It's because even "good" things are also impermanent, and will be gone... We cannot attach to "good" things, or else we will be unhappy, unpeaceful and disappointed by our own attachment towards "good" things, craving for the "good" things, clinging onto the "good" things...


The nature will take care of everything in its own way, performing their duties without attachment, intention, judgment, or expectation... That's why nature is the mother or the source of everything in the universe...

It is the ego that wants to have the power to control "things" to be what it likes them to be... But our true nature doesn't need to control anything...

The mind is the projector of the world, and the destroyer of the world. When there is no mind, there is no world...

An impure world was born out of an impure mind.

A suffering world was born out of a suffering mind.

A peaceful world was born out of a peaceful mind.

Have control of our own mind by not being controlled by it, and persistently purifying and quieting our own mind, eradicate the ego, is the real freedom. It is not by trying to control "things" or to change the world to be the way that we want them to be...

Tame this mind, and the "world" will be tamed...

This is what the enlightened saints and sages had been trying to teach us...

Om shanti.

1 comment:

  1. U have come a happy long way since Seri Petaling aerobic/yoga, teacher....well done. Adrienne

    ReplyDelete

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Know thyself. There is no existence of 'I'. Everything is impermanent. Be free, be peaceful, be happy.

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My husband and I run ongoing yoga retreats in Langkawi Malaysia. We teach traditional Hatha Yoga - a combination of Asanas (postures) and Pranayama (breathing techniques) and relaxation, that has given benefit to millions of practitioners over thousands of years. Our yoga studio is situated in Langkawi. We also run yoga retreats in Europe and India.

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