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Saturday, July 7, 2018

Surrendering desires, intention, expectation

When someone wants to join a 'yoga course' or 'yoga retreat', it's normal that there's a desire, or intention, or expectation towards the experience or the fruit/result of such effort/action being performed.

It's mostly about "What will 'I' get or be benefited from doing this?"

"I am here to learn something that will lead me to freedom and peace."
"I am here to attain peace and happiness."
"I am here to be free from unhappiness and suffering."
"I am here to heal myself (my body, my mind and/or my soul.)"
"I am here to be unwind/relaxed to feel good/peaceful."

And that is also the reason why people keep going for courses and retreats again and again, but the mind is still desiring/expecting to learn 'something that will lead me to freedom and peace', or to attain peace and happiness, or to be free from unhappiness and suffering, or to be healed, or to be unwind/relaxed to feel good/peaceful.

Contemplate on the teaching of "The mind and the body is not I. I am not the body and the mind."

Contemplate on what is intentionlessness. Neither good intention to motivate good actions nor bad intention to motivate bad actions, but good actions are being performed while bad actions are being refrained.

Contemplate on what is "There's no 'I' perform actions, or 'I' receive the fruit of actions." even though there are ceaseless actions and the consequences of actions, or cause and effect arising and passing away being the by-products of the impermanent existence/life maintenance of the body and the restless egoistic mind.

It's the body and the mind performing the practice, and the body and the mind will be receiving the fruit/effect of the practice. And the body and the mind is impermanent and selfless regardless of being in good or bad condition/state. It's not 'I' am performing the practice and 'I' will be receiving the fruit/effect of the practice.

In many of the 'yoga classes', the 'yoga teacher' would ask the students to create a good/kind/positive/happy/meaningful 'intention' or 'aspiration' in their mind before and/or after the class to achieve something that they desire through their efforts of performing the practice or ritual. Such like, "I am awesome!", "I am positive!", "I am strong!", "I am healthy!", "I am good!", "I am enough!", "I am perfect!", "I am happy!", "I am compassionate!", "I am love or I am loved!", "I wish the world be good!", "I wish my children good health!", or "I wish everyone love, peace, joy and happiness!"

It's all about 'I' and what 'I' desire to be/to have, or what 'I' desire other people/the world to be/to have. That's why the mind doesn't progress any further after many years of 'practicing yoga' because the mind is still holding on strongly onto the idea of 'I' as well as 'intention' or 'expectation' that is about gratifying the desire of craving and aversion, because that is what they have been learning/practicing for many years by attending 'yoga classes' regularly. There is something that they desire and something that they don't desire that they hope to be gratified from performing some kinds of action, practice, or ritual. Hoping that everything will be good the way that they like it to be, that they think/believe it should be, and nothing bad.

There's nothing wrong, and it's very good to have good and positive thinking/thoughts than to have bad and negative thinking/thoughts, but it can become a great obstacle on the path of yoga. Even though the mind and the body is getting the momentary effects/benefits of performing the practice regularly, the mind is not free because the mind is still under the influence of ignorance and egoism.

Surrendering any desire/intention/expectation and all that is related to the idea of 'I' and 'my', just do the best while performing actions/practice and allowing the fruit of actions/practice to be what it is, is the teaching and practice of yoga. This is real 'non-attachment' or 'renunciation'.

Some people said, "I don't really know why I am here. I have no intention to be here. I don't know what to expect. But somehow, I'm here." And that 'allows' their minds to be open towards any possibilities, without being bound/limited by any particular desire, intention, expectation, aspiration, anticipation, imagination, or projection.

Once the mind realized selflessness/desireless/non-craving and non-aversion, there's no need to repeatedly attending 'yoga classes', or 'yoga courses', or 'yoga retreats' with the intention/expectation to learn something that will lead one to freedom and peace, or to attain peace and happiness, or to be free from unhappiness and suffering, or to be healed, or to be unwind/relaxed to feel good/peaceful, because this mind is free and peaceful as it is.

There's no "I need to learn something that will lead me to freedom and peace."

There's no "I need to attain peace and happiness."

There's no "I need to be free from unhappiness and suffering."

There's no "I need to heal myself (my body, my mind and/or my soul.)"

There's no "I need to be unwind/relaxed to feel good/peaceful."

Meanwhile, it's not as easy as it says for the mind to be free from ignorance and egoism, or be free from disturbs or suffering, and hence, most minds still need to go to someone/somewhere to learn and practice yoga.

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Know thyself. Everything is impermanent and selfless. There is no 'I'. There is no 'I am selfless'/'I am not selfless'. There is no 'I am hurt'/'I need to be healed from hurt'. Non-blind believing, non-blind following, non-blind practicing and non-blind propagating, but be open-minded to inquire the truth of everything. Be free. Be peaceful. Be happy.

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