be free, be happy, be peaceful

May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Monday, May 17, 2010

About Sharing Happiness

We can only share happiness with others when we ourselves know how to be happy and are happy. If we are not happy (it means we don't know how to be happy), then how can we share happiness with others and ask others to be happy, when we don't have happiness in ourselves?

We can share our joy and happiness with all beings without any discrimination of human beings or non-human beings, good beings or bad beings, happy beings or unhappy beings, wise beings or ignorant beings, but we cannot give happiness to others nor can we make other beings to become happy.

If one can give happiness to others or can make another being to become happy, then there shouldn't be any beings being unhappy in the world, because we can just give happiness to everyone and make everyone happy. But it doesn't work like that. Not even Buddha nor any enlightened beings can make another being to become happy or to become enlightened. If it is so easy, we can just ask for happiness or enlightenment and be happy forever and be enlightened. It is all come from within ourselves. Happiness or enlightenment, it is up to our own efforts to realize them within ourselves. It cannot be given or be bought from someone else. All the teachers and teachings are there to guide us to attain true happiness and enlightenment by our own effort.

When beings are unhappy, have no peace in the heart, the mind is full of attachment, ignorance, anger, hatred, jealousy, arrogance, dissatisfaction, frustration, disappointment, doubt, fear and worry, the mind is feeling depressed and unhappy, then no matter how sincere we want to share joy and happiness with them, they will still be unhappy. We can give them what they want and tell funny stories that might make them feel good and happy for a few moments, but we can't really give them happiness or remove their unhappiness. Everyone has to remove unhappiness in them all by themselves on their own effort.

If the mind is not satisfied or is not happy, then no matter how sincere other people try to make us happy and care for us, or how nice is the environment and how good are the things happen in our lives, we will still be unhappy. Even though we have a good life and have many people to love us and care for us, we still can be unhappy when we are still having a lot of impurities of anger, hatred, jealousy, lust, greed, arrogance, irritation, frustration, dissatisfaction, disappointment, doubt, fear and worry.

If our mind is satisfied and is happy, then everything is good and beautiful, everyone is nice and fine. It doesn't matter if the world is upside down and everything happens against our wish, but everything will be okay and there is no problem if the mind is satisfied and is happy.

The world is not a happy place nor a suffering place. It is our own mind being at peace or not at peace that gives us the impression that the world is a happy place or a suffering place. The world itself has no intention to be good or not good, to be suffering or be free from suffering.

No one can give us happiness nor can anyone takes away our happiness. It is our own mind.

No one can make us happy nor can anyone makes us unhappy. It is our own mind as well.

It is our own mind that is feeling happy when it is pure, calm and at peace, while it will be feeling unhappy when it is not pure, not calm and not at peace. We think that it is the things out there and whatever happens in our bodies and in our lives that make us happy or unhappy. In fact, it is nothing to do with anybody else or any happenings in our bodies or in our lives. We think that we are the one who is happy or unhappy, but it is not. It is the mind feels happy or unhappy. We are not the mind. The mind is not us. If we stop identify ourselves with the mind, we will be at peace all the time, not being affected or disturbed or influenced by the state of our mind. And the state of the mind whether it's happy or unhappy, it is also impermanent. True happiness comes when we are beyond the happy and unhappy feelings, and beyond the state of peacefulness or calmess when the mind is free from impurities. It's because this state of peacefulness and calmness is also impermanent. If we can unattach even to this temporary state of peacefulness and calmness that comes from the mind, then we will be beyond the mind and be truly at peace transcending all the states of the mind.

To be happy or unhappy, it is all up to our own self. The feeling of happy and unhappy is coming from the mind. If we are still attach to the mind, then we will think that we are happy or unhappy according to the state of our mind. The truth is, if we know how to not attach to our mind, we are just the awareness that is witnessing all the states of the mind, then no matter the mind feels calm or disturbed, happy or unhappy, good or bad, we will know that it is not us, it is just the mind. Go beyond the mind and go beyond the happy and unhappy feelings, we will be free from happiness and unhappiness, and be truly happy.

Happy feelings come from a peaceful mind, without fear and worry, without ignorance and other impurities. But true and lasting happiness is beyond this happy feeling that comes from a peaceful mind. Before we can go beyond the state of peaceful mind, we need to be able to achieve the state of peacefulness in the mind. We need to transcend Tamas (darkness) with Rajas (activeness), and transcend Rajas with Sattva (calmness). And then we can transcend sattva with non-attachment. Everlasting peacefulness comes when we are beyond all the three Gunas and not being affected by these gunas anymore.

How to make our mind peaceful?

By understanding the truth of everything. When we understand the truth of everything and know what is going on in our mind, then only we can accept the truth as it is. When we can accept the truth as it is, we can let go and not attach to anything. When there is no attachment at all, there is no fear, no worry at all. When there is no worry and no fear, peacefulness is there. When we are at peace, happy feeling is there, and true happiness is beyond the happy feeling that comes from the mind.

How to understand the truth of everything?

Materializing the yoga philosophy and its practice in our lives, such like Yama, Niyama, Asana, Pranayama, Dharana, Dhyana and Samadhi are one of the ways for anybody to realize the wisdom that is already within us. By gaining control of the mind and not attach to the mind, wisdom will arise within us. With this wisdom, we will understand the truth of everything, accept the world as it is, accept everything as it is, accept everyone as they are, and accept ourselves as we are. We will be free from the past and the future, and be free from ignorance and unhappiness.

When we care for somebody who is unhappy and share our knowledge with others about how to attain true happiness, it is up to their own efforts whether they will be happy or they will remain unhappy. When the people are happy when we share happiness with them, actually it is not us that make them happy, but it is because their own mind is at peace and is satisfied for that time being. If anyone is happy, it is because after they understand the truth of things, and are able to accept the reality as it is and able to let go. It is not us make them happy. They can remain unhappy as well if they still don't understand the truth of things, and are not able to accept the reality as it is and not able to let go. That's all.

If we truly understand the truth and are wise, we will not be attached to the action of giving and sharing, and will not be disturbed nor be affected by the fruit of the action. We can give and share unlimitedly and unconditionally. We will be free from judgment, comparison, expectation, dissatisfaction and disappointment. We will never feel tired even though we give so much, if we are not identify as the doer of the action, and act without the influence from the ego but act from the selfless compassion. We are just the channel or the instrument for the universal consciousness to act in the world to help the suffering beings to come out from miseries. We act without any selfish intentions. It is only when we have selfish intentions behind all our actions, it will generate expectation, tensions, stress, attachment, tiredness, dissatisfaction, disappointment, fear and worry in us.

If we act out of selfless compassion to serve others, to carry out our multiple duties as a human being, as a friend, as a child, as a parent, as a citizen, as a teacher, as a student, as a brother or sister, as a leader, as an employee or employer, as a wife or husband, as a partner or companion, as "this" and "that" and so on..., then there will be no stress and tensions at all. There is no attachment. There is no fear and no worry. There is only love, joy and peace.

Give and share, and let go.

Be true. Be free. Be happy.

May all beings be happy.

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Know thyself. There is no existence of 'I'. Everything is impermanent. Be free, be peaceful, be happy.

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My husband and I run ongoing yoga retreats in Langkawi Malaysia. We teach traditional Hatha Yoga - a combination of Asanas (postures) and Pranayama (breathing techniques) and relaxation, that has given benefit to millions of practitioners over thousands of years. Our yoga studio is situated in Langkawi. We also run yoga retreats in Europe and India.

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