Responsibility, commitment engaging, risk taking, and decision or choice making, can be difficult or troublesome for some minds. There's nothing wrong or bad with that, as life is still what it is, selfless and impermanent, regardless of whether the mind has or doesn't have difficulty in having certain responsibility, engaging in certain commitment, taking certain risk, or making certain decision and what are the decisions made.
It's okay, sometimes the mind doesn't like and doesn't want certain responsibility or commitment, or doesn't want to take certain risk, or doesn't want to be responsible towards making certain decision. More importantly, is that the mind has no attachment, identification, comparison, or judgment towards all that, and is still peaceful as one is.
But there are quite some minds are being disturbed by all that, and have no peace, as they are being over-whelmed by the sense of guilt or regret most of the time. No matter what or how, taking or not taking certain responsibility and commitment, making or not making certain decision, and choosing this or that, the minds will always feel regret, thinking that maybe the other option is better than this option that it has taken or chosen.
All and everything has inevitable risk that is not necessarily pleasant, desirable and agreeable. Just by being existing here in this world, has certain risk. Not making any movements or not going anywhere, also has certain risk. Being here has certain risk. Being somewhere else also has certain risk. Every single choice/decision/desire/movement/step/action/reaction/non-action/non-reaction also has certain risk, either common or uncommon, expected or unexpected, directly or indirectly.
Most of the time, one gains something while loosing something in any decision or choice.
The mind that is not spending most of the time and energy into working or making a living in the present, might not be generating any income, but then it can have the free time and energy to be doing and enjoying certain things that it didn't manage to do or enjoy while it was being busy generating income, and vice versa.
When the mind knows how to live in the present moment, and appreciates what is here in the present moment, devoid of craving towards something that is not here, devoid of aversion towards something that is here, it will have no problem being here or there, doing this or not doing that.
Making decision, or having desire, or performing action, is not that difficult, as well as 'claiming' the responsibility towards 'the desirable and agreeable consequences or outcome of one's desire, choice and action that is the way that how one thinks and desires it to be' is not troublesome at all.
It's 'the reluctance' or 'the fear' towards
taking 'the responsibility' or 'the risk' towards 'the possible
consequences or outcome of one's desire, choice and action that are not
necessarily desirable or agreeable the way that how one thinks and
desires it to be', or 'the reluctance' towards being responsible for
'the consequences that come along with engaging in certain commitments
out of one's own desire and choice', that is why the minds think and feel
that they have difficulty or trouble with commitment engaging and decision or choice making.
something in common that many minds have difficulty towards making
certain decision or choice, or taking certain responsibilities, or
engaging in certain commitments, particularly when there are more and
more confusions, lies, hypocrisy and disappointments arising and
existing in this world of ignorance, egoism, separateness,
discrimination, fear, greed, possessiveness, and selfishness, where
people don't know, or can't really tell the difference between true and
false anymore, or what they should believe or disbelieve anymore.
The mind needs to realize what is selflessness, in order to understand about responsibility, as well as not to be afraid towards taking responsibility, even though all and everything are selfless, and impermanent (uncertainty).
Selflessness, where there's no 'I', or an infinite existence of a permanent independent individual identity to be responsible towards all kinds of selfless impermanent changes, or cause and effect, as well as, all and everything depending on the supportive selfless elements and selfless energy to be existing and functioning, it doesn't mean that there's no responsibility in anyone (the selfless body and mind) towards their own life existence, their own thinking, belief/disbelief, reasoning, understanding, choices, desires, behavior, actions and reactions, and the consequences of all that.
Coming into this selfless impermanent worldly life existence of the selfless function of a selfless impermanent body and perceptive thinking mind, it's not out of anyone's own desire or choice, because there were/are many minds didn't/don't intent or desire to be existing here (in a selfless impermanent world of inevitable suffering of restlessness or selfless impermanent changes, that is also full of unnecessary suffering deriving from ignorance and the consequences of ignorance), but they were/are here, selflessly and reluctantly, under the cause generated out of the desire and action of the parents, either intentionally or unintentionally.
Merely by being existing and functioning selflessly and impermanently here in this world, there come along with certain inevitable duties and responsibilities towards upholding the survival or life maintenance of this body and mind, towards looking after the over-all well-being of oneself and/or some others, and towards looking after the surrounding living environment that support the life maintenance of this body and mind.
No doubt that, if without the parents generated the cause that gives rise to the forming of this selfless body and mind, this body and mind doesn't exist, and hence, the parents are indeed responsible for the initial cause for the existence and function of this body and mind.
The parents' genetic inheritance, mentality, behavior, and parenting method can be influencing the genetic condition, the physical and mental ability and limitation, way of thinking, belief/disbelief, reasoning, understanding, desire and doesn't desire, behavior, actions, and reactions of this body and mind, up to a certain extend, particularly before this body and mind developed physical and mental maturity or independence.
While upon reaching certain degrees of physical and mental
maturity or independence, the mind has the basic awareness, understanding and
cognition towards this body and mind can have choices towards choosing
and building its own particular way of living, different types of
commitment or responsibility, way of thinking, belief/disbelief, reasoning, understanding, desires or
doesn't desires, behavior, action and inaction, and to be making its own decision
on many things in life, that will give rise to
certain consequences that are not necessarily exactly the way that how
the mind thinks, desires and expects how it should be, but that's okay. The selfless mind
can choose whether it wants or doesn't want to be looking after the
over-all well-being of this body and mind in certain way or not in
certain way, or how it wants and doesn't want to think and behave, under its own way of thinking, reasoning, understanding, desire,
choice, and action. All that are not the responsibility of the parents, but this body and mind itself.
The selfless elements and energy are only being what they are, selflessly forming and supporting the selfless existence and selfless function of the physical body and mind out of an existing cause that doesn't come from the selfless elements and energy at all, but it's deriving from the desire and action of the parents of this body and mind, either intentionally or unintentionally.
Without the supportive selfless elements and energy, all bodies and minds don't exist or function. The selfless elements and energy are responsible for forming and supporting the existence and function of all bodies and minds, but they are not responsible for the particular way of thinking, belief/disbelief, reasoning, understanding, decision and choice making, desires and don't desires, behavior, actions and reactions, as well as the consequences of all that, of any particular body and mind. It's the responsibility of each and every selfless mind itself.
There are many minds would justify upon behaving/acting/reacting hurtfully and destructively unto oneself and/or others and the surrounding environment and objects out of disturbance, dissatisfaction, disappointment, unhappiness, anger, and vengeance, "It's not me. Don't blame me. It's the energy. It's the elements. It's the hormones. It's all those bad people. It's my bad and irresponsible parents. It's all those bad and wrong things that have been happening to me in my life. It's because of you, that's why I am doing this. It's because of them, that's why I am behaving/acting/reacting like that."
Even if there are certain decisions and choices, desires and don't desires, or action and inaction in life might be made in accordance to the wish/desire/influence of the parents or some others, with the intention to be pleasing the parents or some others in life, or not to be offending the parents or some others, or to be gaining certain things or reactions in return, or merely to be surviving, or to have less complications in life, but all those decisions, choices, desires, don't desires, action and inaction out of any kind of intention or reason, is still the responsibility of the mind itself.
This body and mind feels happy or unhappy about something or someone, and reacts and behaves in certain way out of happiness or unhappiness, it's its own responsibility. It's not the responsibility of its parents or the selfless elements and energy that are selflessly supporting the existence and function of this body and mind. It is also not the responsibility of that something or someone that the mind feels happy or unhappy about.The mind is the one that decides whether to be determined or undetermined by certain names and forms. The mind is the one that decides whether to be disturbed or undisturbed, to feel hurt or unhurt, to be attached or unattached, to let go or not letting go, to be happy or unhappy, to make certain decision, or not, to have certain commitment, or not, and to behave/act/react ignorantly and hurtfully or wisely and compassionately.
There are certain physical
discomfort or inevitable muscular soreness/tightness during and after certain
physical activities or training, or there are certain mental discomfort
or inevitable mental/emotional disturbance/pain during and after
certain mental activities or training.
The mind has the desire and choice to be learning and performing certain fitness training, or not, and to be participating or not participating in a fitness training session or exercise class under the instructions or guidance of certain instructor. It's the full responsibility of this mind for its engagement in the fitness training session or exercise class, to be looking after its own well-being, without forcing or hurting itself, during the process of learning and performing the fitness training or exercises, regardless of whether it is self-learning and self-practice, or there is an instructor being there giving certain instructions or guidance to be performing certain movements, exercises, or training. It's the full responsibility of the mind itself whether to be performing all, or partial, or none of the movements or training (taking rest), at what timing, speed and intensity, depending on the condition of the body and mind in the present moment.
Similarly, in the process of learning and performing certain yoga practice or implementing certain teachings of yoga in everyday life. The yoga student or practitioner takes full responsibility towards itself for all its action/inaction and consequences of action/inaction. The teachers and the teachings are just being what they are, delivering the teachings and practice to the students, but it's the student's full responsibility towards what it wants or doesn't want to practice, depending on the condition of the body and mind in the present moment.
The minds that know non-attachment, non-identification, non-craving, non-aversion, non-judgment and non-expectation, that are not being determined by duality of success and failure, or good and bad, or accomplishment and non-accomplishment, or agreeable and disagreeable, or desirable and undesirable, they can take the responsibility towards the consequences or outcome of all their decisions, choices and actions as it is. They will have no difficulty or problem in decision or choice making, risk taking, commitment engaging, as well as performing all the existing 'not by one's own desire or choice' inevitable worldly duties and responsibilities that come along with this selfless impermanent life existence in this world.
That is also why the teachings and practice of yoga and/or buddhism about self-inquiry, self-realization, meditation, mental and emotional independence, renunciation, dispassion, seclusion and solitude, that is mainly about self-compassion, self-effort, self-reliance, or self-help, is more and more relevant in this time being, before the mind loses its precious sanity, or the precious ability and clarity to be reasoning everything, to have peace during the momentary limited life existence of being existing and functioning here, that directly and indirectly affecting the over-all well-being of the body and mind, that is influencing the behavior, action and reaction of the perceptive thinking and acting mind in certain way, that affects the surrounding living environment of a world of many diversities that doesn't belong to anyone.
To have peace in oneself, is indeed the biggest duty and responsibility of all minds that are momentarily co-existing and sharing this space of the universe that doesn't belong to anyone or anything.
Peace isn't being built on, or be obtained through 'controlling' or 'making' the world and life existence in this space that doesn't belong to anyone to be the way that 'I' and/or 'we' think and believe and desire how it should be.
Peace is always there, as it is, upon the minds are free from the influence of ignorance, the idea of 'I', egoism, impurities, and restlessness, where no mind tries to claim ownership/possession/authority/control towards the world of many diversities in this space that doesn't belong to anyone, to be the way that 'I' and/or 'we' think and believe and desire how it should be, while respecting all kinds of diversities being what they are, to have their own way of everything, allowing all minds whether to take their own initiative to be free from the influence of ignorance, egoism, impurities and restlessness, or not, at their own cause and pace, or to have the most important FREEDOM of existence to be existing in this space, and to have the FREEDOM of being, to be what they are, and not being discriminated, threatened, oppressed, prosecuted, punished, intimidated, bullied, or hurt, for being existing in this space, and being what they are.
The existence of OPENNESS, or the FREEDOM of existence and being, to be what all and everyone are, is the only way that enabling the ignorant egoistic impure confused suffering minds to have the opportunity or the initiation to reflect upon itself, to be initiative to free itself from the influence of ignorance, egoism, impurities and restlessness, and the consequences of all that - all kinds of destructive hurtful damaging behavior, actions and reactions that hurt oneself and others and the surrounding environment during their momentary existence and function in this world, out of its own freewill via its own awareness, understanding, self-discipline, and self-effort.
It doesn't matter if the mind cannot 'trust' or 'rely on' anyone or anything anymore, but one cannot loose 'the trust' or 'the self-reliance' that is always there accommodating itself unconditionally during its selfless impermanent limited existence.
Need not to be afraid of 'Aloneness', 'Solitude', 'Seclusion', 'Renunciation', 'Dispassion', 'Silence', 'Mental and emotional independence'. It's the way that leads towards the non-discriminating and all accommodating source, or peace, or dhamma, or knowledge, or teacher, or guru, that the selfless impermanent mind can 'trust' and 'rely on', when all and everything are falling apart (it will, sooner or later, because of the nature of impermanence in all and everything). That selfless, timeless and changeless, nameless and formless source/peace/dhamma/knowledge/teacher/guru is always there, being what it is, even when this particular selfless impermanent body and mind is constantly changing, decaying, and disintegrating, not to say, all kinds of names and forms being perceived through this selfless mind are constantly changing, decaying, and disintegrating.
"You are left alone now." - Swami Sivananda