be free, be happy, be peaceful

May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Being At The Present Moment - No Fear, No Worry

I would like to share with you something about the present moment now and how it can help us to remove fear and worry.

Today, one of our students asked us whether we are happy to have moved to Langkawi, living in a small village rather than living in Kuala Lumpur, a big city. He also asked us whether teaching yoga in Langkawi is any less opportunity or less "business" than in Kuala Lumpur? He also asked how could we give up our life, jobs, family and friends in Kuala Lumpur just like that without feeling fear and worry about the new living environment and to start a new livinghood?

It was so strange (but not surprised) that I realized that I couldn't really give definite answers to these questions. Simply it's because they are irrelevant questions for me. I couldn't give an answer of "yes" or "no". Because the moving from Kuala Lumpur to Langkawi is not something better or worst. There is nothing to be compared about. There is no comparison or expectation in me. It is not making me happy or unhappy. I am just being at the present moment now. Everything just happens naturally due to a cause. It is not something that I want or don't want, like or don't like.

For start, I never felt that I had to give up anything. My life is not in Kuala Lumpur nor in Langkawi. Life is not being bound by a place. It is unlimited by time and space. Life carries on wherever I go, whether staying permanently at one place or visiting places or on holidays.

This is not a new life for me. Life goes on but just being at a different place and having different routines. I still eat, drink, act, rest, share and be happy.

About jobs, I never see that teaching yoga is a job nor as a business. It is merely sharing, giving and receiving. Through the grace of the universal consciousness, we share the knowledge and joy of yoga with the people who need the knowledge and joy that derive from wisdom and compassion. At the same time, these people who learn yoga from us support us to continue in this sharing of knowledge and joy with some other people by giving us some fees for our living and for the maintainence of the yoga centre so that other people can have the opportunity to come here to learn yoga. This is giving and receiving, or energy exchange to keep the wheel of dharma continue to turn. This is a great merit. Both the teacher and the students are sharing by giving to each other and receiving from each other. There is no gain and no loss.

Teaching yoga or sharing the knowledge and joy is not limited by a place. It is unlimited and unconditioned by time and space. I can teach or share yoga with anyone who are in need of knowledge and joy, at anywhere and at anytime. It is not limited in a yoga centre, nor limited in the two or three hours yoga asana class. It is in life every moment. It is not about the asana exercises at all. It is about unleashing the wisdom in everyone by realizing the Self. With wisdom, there is no ignorance. Without ignorance, there is no unhappiness or suffering. It is not about the fees also. Those who could not afford to give anything, still can receive the gift of dharma, the knowledge and joy from anyone who are practicing yoga without name and form in the heart, in life, every moment. While those who can give and support the wheel of dharma continues to turn, can provide the teacher and the yoga centre with some fees to keep them survive and to share with more people who are in need of knowledge and joy.

Whether in Kuala Lumpur or in Langkawi or in somewhere else, I still share yoga with all. There is no differences at all for me to teach yoga in Kuala Lumpur to a group of Chinese Malaysian who come for classes regularly or teach yoga in Langkawi to people who are coming from many different countries just for one or a few classes. Everyone still gets the same benefits from the classes. Wherever people need "me" to be there, I will be there happily. It is not about I want to live in certain place and start teaching yoga there to make a living so that I can live in a place that I like. It is the sharing of yoga that brings me to wherever I am and allows me to live at that place. I don't need to worry about living, money or anything at all. Even if there is nobody coming for classes, it still doesn't stop me from having yoga in me and sharing yoga with all. Even if I have to suffer hunger and die of hunger, and if that's my karma, let it be.

I am very grateful and appreciate what I am having now and what I am doing now. In the past, maybe I was selfish, unhappy and grumpy, but it was already the past. Now, is the only reality. Now is what matter most. And the future not yet come, why worry about what I am going to become? Now, I am fine. Now, I am peaceful.

I never thought of teaching yoga before I started teaching yoga. I never thought of living and teaching yoga in Langkawi before we moved here. Everything just happened. This house that we live in and teach yoga was there waiting for us to come. It was empty for nine months before we moved in, despite all the houses around here were fully occupied and this is a popular area for tourists to rent a holiday home for short stay and long stay.

Yoga is not a "business". It is not about how much money we can make from teaching yoga. It is not about less people or more people coming to learn yoga from us. It is not about the price of a yoga class that we charge people. It is not about whether we can teach a "good" class or not. It is not about the people are satisfied with our teachings or not. It is not about "thank you" or being "ungrateful" or not. It is sharing, giving and receiving at the same time. It is unlimited and unconditioned by name and form, good or bad, big or small, success or failure, praise or condemn. It is all about selflessness, compassion and wisdom. It is beyond all the names and forms. It is beyond likes and dislikes. It is beyond "teachers" and "students".

About family and friends, I never felt any separation from them at all even though we are not together in the same place or not living under the same roof. I also have no craving for love and attention or companionship from anybody. I have all beings as my family and friends anywhere and anytime, it is not limited in the family ties or in personal relationship or friendship. My "relationship" with everyone is not limited in this life time also. Or more precise is that I don't see myself are different from anybody and are not separated from anyone or anything. I am never lonely, even though I am alone all by myself. Once I am beyond all the differentiations of name and form, and beyond the separateness and different relationships with all, there is no more "attachment" nor "detachment". There is no more fear and worry. There is no more togetherness or separateness. There is no more loneliness or needing love and attention.

Attachment only exists when there is separateness. When there is no more separateness and all are one, where is the attachment? Attachment happens when there is "something" separated from us, for us to attach to. And if there is no attachment, there is no need of detachment. It is the same, if my thoughts, action and speech are purified, there is no need of self-control, self-restraint or observances.

I had never "left" anyone even though I am not with them at the same place anymore, or not seeing them and not being with them at all. To care for somebody and to share love and joy is not necessary to be with somebody, being together all the time and do things together. In the heart, in our consciousness, we can give and share so much but it is unseen by the eyes, unheard by the ears, unsmelled by the nose, untasted by the tongue, untouched by the physical body and unlimited by the thinking mind. I am with all, all the time, through out the causeless universal consciousness. There is no boundaries. There is no separateness of space, time and form.

I am happy and contented being here in Langkawi or when I was being there in Kuala Lumpur. I don't feel living in the city is a problem nor do I feel living in a small village is any less than living in the city. Some people say that living in the city is very nice and comfortable, very convenient, and lots of things happening. Some other people say that living in the village is better than in the city because it does give us a better quality of life. They all are right.

For me, it is not about to live in a better place or not, or to obtain a better quality of life or not, but as long as my heart is peaceful and happy, wherever I am, it is just fine. Everywhere has its pros and cons. There is no perfect place in the world, if we are not satisfied with our own self. But everywhere is fine when we are satisfied with our own self. Yoga is everywhere, in and out, up and down, exist and non-exist.

I wasn't unhappy about living in Kuala Lumpur when we moved to Langkawi. I wasn't looking for a place to move away from where I was. I wasn't looking for doing something differently from what I was doing. I just be. Be at where I am now. Be at the present moment now. There is no fear, no worry about different environment or about the future. I surrender completely, allowing life and yoga to bring me to wherever I am.

If Kuala Lumpur is not the place for me now, let it be. If Langkawi is not the place for me later, let it be. Most important and the only reality is, at this present moment Now, Langkawi is the place for me. That's why I am here, and not somewhere else. Why do I need to worry? Why do I need to compare the past and now? Why do I need to project so much for the future?

Yes, I am happy living in Langkawi now, but that doesn't mean that I was not happy living in Kuala Lumpur. I am happy anywhere, even when I was living in the "lowest" quality of living environment in Sri Sentosa where there were many gangsters, drugs dealing, fighting, violence, family problems and community gossiping. It didn't change me into a bad being or made me a better being than other people. It didn't bother me, my life and my peacefulness. The poor hygiene in that area also didn't make me sick or unhealthy. I am still what I am. In fact living in a worst environment can be a good training ground for compassion and wisdom. I had no fear at all. Most of the times I came home late at night after teaching classes, walking alone on the street from where I parked the car and I was living by myself alone. The only apartment there that has no grills on the door and windows is my apartment. One of the students stopped coming for yoga class because she has lots of fear and she felt insecure when she was in my apartment. She has the right to feel like that because in the past she had been robbed just in front of her house. From then on, she was full of fear whether she was at home or on the street. I wish her peace and wisdom, may she be free from this great fear one day.

Teaching yoga in Langkawi is not any less or any more than teaching yoga in Kuala Lumpur. There is no gain or loss teaching yoga here or at somewhere else.

I didn't give up anyone or anything at all. No past, no future, I am just being at the present moment now, being at where I am now, doing what I am doing now.

All are impermanent. There is no certainty in everything. Life is transitory. Why worry then?

When we are selfless and compassionate, there is no fear, no worry. Fear and worry exist when we are attached strongly to our body and the mind. Fear and worry come from the mind. When we are no more identifying with the body and the mind, fear and worry will vanish.

May all beings be happy.

Om Shanti.

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Know thyself. There is no existence of 'I'. Everything is impermanent. Be free, be peaceful, be happy.

Om shanti

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Pantai Cenang, Langkawi, Kedah, Malaysia
My husband and I run ongoing yoga retreats in Langkawi Malaysia. We teach traditional Hatha Yoga - a combination of Asanas (postures) and Pranayama (breathing techniques) and relaxation, that has given benefit to millions of practitioners over thousands of years. Our yoga studio is situated in Langkawi. We also run yoga retreats in Europe and India.

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