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May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Thursday, May 23, 2019

Disturbed / hurt by remembering/thinking about past unpleasant experiences

Minds that feel being disturbed or hurt by 'something' that is being perceived/acknowledged as 'hurtful', 'wrongful', 'bad', 'disturbing', or 'undeserving', they are actually being disturbed or hurt by the remembrance towards the perceived names and forms that doesn't exist in NOW, unwittingly attached onto the perceived names and forms (past experiences in the form of memories), being determined by the past memories as well as keep feeding these memories to keep them 'alive' to be shadowing/haunting the mind repeatedly in NOW.

The past is not just about whatever happened some time ago.

What is here in NOW is constantly changing/passing away and instantly becoming part of the past memory that is made up of a continuous chain of countless pieces of thoughts/images.

For example, maybe someone says and does something that is hurtful/wrongful/bad/disturbing to this person (this mind) in this present moment NOW.

The mind immediately processes this experience and will analyze and assert, "This is something hurtful/wrongful/disturbing that I or anyone don't deserve to be experiencing." and react with "I am/feel disturbed and hurt by this." and by the time the mind is analyzing and asserting about 'this experience', 'this experience' is already beyond NOW being stored as part of the memory. But somehow, the mind will continuously feel disturbed and hurt by the continuous remembrance of "This is something hurtful/wrongful/bad/disturbing that I or anyone don't deserve to be experiencing." and continuously react with "I am/feel disturbed and hurt by this." Even when 'this experience' that instantly becomes 'that experience' which existed moment/seconds/minutes/hours/days/weeks/months/years ago, that doesn't exist in the NOW, and even when the memory starts to fade away and changed into some blurred images that are not exactly what it really was as it happened, the mind will still be disturbed and hurt by the remembrance towards 'the disturb/hurt reacted towards that experience'.

It's always, "You/They did this." or "You/They said that." This is truly unnecessary. Imagine if someone is completely forgetful about everything or has no function of memory to be remembering anything, what is there to disturb or hurt this mind?

It's not about erasing one's memories to be free from disturbs or hurts coming from continuously remembering the past experiences that the mind perceived as 'disturbing'/'hurtful'/'wrongful'/'bad', but it's developing the ability of 'non-attachment' to be unattached/non-clinging/non-grasping/non-craving/non-aversion towards all the thought/emotion activities in NOW perceiving all the pleasant/unpleasant names and forms or desirable/undesirable experiences, and all that is being stored as part of the memory that constantly arising and passing away in the mind in NOW.

If the mind is always being in the NOW, without attachment towards what is NOW and beyond NOW (memories or imaginations), being aware of but without attachment/clinging towards any thought/emotion activities of the mind as well as the pleasant/unpleasant memories/images constantly arising and passing away in the mind in NOW, then this mind won't be disturbed or hurt by anything at all, not even being disturbed by what is happening NOW or the constant flashback of memories of the past thought/emotion activities perceiving all kinds of pleasant or unpleasant, agreeable or disagreeable, desirable or undesirable names and forms.

The real practice of non-attachment, is not about having very few or zero things/objects/relationships/enjoyments in life, or ignoring/neglecting one's duty/responsibility and do nothing to improve, but it's about non-clinging/non-grasping/non-craving/non-aversion/non-judgment/non-expectation towards what is going on in the thinking mind (the modifications of the mind), of whatever the mind perceives in NOW and all that beyond NOW (memories and imaginations), allowing all the pleasant/unpleasant, agreeable/disagreeable, desirable/undesirable names and forms being there as they are and ceaselessly changing as they are, arising and passing away as they are.

Go beyond the worldly thinking and belief about "Life has to be in certain ways and people must behave in certain ways to live a good, happy, joyful and meaningful life, or else life is not good, happy, joyful or meaningful." Life is just what it is. It doesn't has to be in certain ways and people don't have to behave in certain ways, while life doesn't need to be good, happy, joyful and meaningful the way that the mind thinks and believes what is good/happy/joyful/meaningful. Life is neither good nor bad, neither happy nor unhappy, neither joyful nor joyless, neither meaningful nor meaningless.

Whether one is practicing yoga, or not, is not determined by whether one is doing some 'yoga practice' in the form of Pranayama, Asana, Yamas, Niyamas, Kriyas, Japa/Kirtan and etc, or not, but it's whether there is attachment towards the modifications of the mind, or not. If there's attachment, there's no peace. Peace is there as it is, in the absence of attachment.

Be free.

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About Yoga

Know thyself. Everything is impermanent and selfless. There is no 'I'. There is no 'I am selfless'/'I am not selfless'. There is no 'I am hurt'/'I need to be healed from hurt'. Non-blind believing, non-blind following, non-blind practicing and non-blind propagating, but be open-minded to inquire the truth of everything. Be free. Be peaceful. Be happy.

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