Because most people were being told from young that confidence and self-confidence is a highly important quality that will influence and determine whether someone will be successful in whatever one pursues, and whether one will achieve certain accomplishment in life, or not, where people were being told that they need to have self-confidence, or what people refer as 'believing in oneself', as well as to develop and empower the sense of confidence, or what people refer as have faith in everything that support everything to be possible, where people think and believe that confidence or faith will make all the impossible become possible, and hence, people might not understand that they don't really need to have self-confidence to be who they are, that they don't really need confidence at all for carrying out their duties and responsibilities, looking after themselves or other beings, and for doing something or achieving something in life, whether it's something essential or non-essential.
That's why the very basic yoga practice is about freeing the mind from being conditioned by all kinds of worldly egoistic social/cultural/religious/spiritual/commercial/political/educational thinking, belief, values and practice. And this seems to be very hard for many yoga enthusiasts, where they would prefer to give themselves many justifications/reasons of why they don't need to be free from being conditioned by their existing inherited or adopted worldly thinking, belief, values and practice.
Quite many people are suffering from either low confidence (I can't do/achieve anything) or over confidence (I can do and achieve anything), which affect their life, their action/reaction, and their relationship with all and everyone.
The heart doesn't need to have self-confidence or confidence in order to be pumping the blood throughout the entire body every moment from the beginning of forming until it ceases functioning.
The hands don't need to have self-confidence or confidence to pick up a cup of hot drink, and to put down the hot cup instantly, because the cup is still too hot to hold.
The stomach and intestines don't need to have self-confidence or confidence to digest the food and extract nutrients from the food and to eliminate the non-digestible food waste.
It's either these organs are getting the enough supply of energy, hormones, secretions, oxygen, nutrients, minerals and water that they need, and the muscles and nerves are functioning properly, as well as not being overuse/over-worked, or not being attacked by some bacteria/virus, or not, in order to be functioning smoothly, or not.
It's the same in life. Self-confidence and confidence is not needed in order for someone to do or achieve something.
In the process of doing something, or trying to do or achieve something, or trying to be somebody, and whether one will be successful, or not, in one's pursue, self-confidence and confidence is irrelevant.It's whether one has sufficient knowledge and understanding, and maybe also specific talent about something that one wants to do or achieve, and whether one has been training and practicing enough to develop and enhance the skill for doing or achieving something, as well as there are many other external factors that determine whether one can do or achieve something successfully at that specific time, space and causation, or not, even one has the sufficient talent, knowledge, understanding and skill in doing or achieving something.
We need to have certain knowledge and skill in order to do certain things or to achieve something, and different things or achievements require different types of knowledge and skill, on top of most things are sharing certain common knowledge and skill.
If we don't know how to do something because we don't have that particular knowledge and skill to do certain things or to achieve something, then we need to learn and practice until we can do certain things and to achieve something with the required knowledge and well-trained skill.
If someone has intense self-confidence strongly believing in oneself, and has high confidence towards oneself can do anything or can achieve anything successfully, but if without the specific knowledge or skill in doing certain things or to achieve certain achievements, it doesn't work.
What stops people from 'actually doing something regardless of what is the outcome', where people are having some ideas/thinking/aspiration about want to do something, but they have doubt, unsure, or uncertainty towards whether they can/should do it, or not, is because there is attachment and expectation towards the outcome or result has to be and not to be in certain way. There is fear towards failure and disappointment, or there's craving towards success and aversion towards failure. This fear towards failure and disappointment that stops people from actually doing something, is mainly due to pride and arrogance, "I cannot fail", "I don't want failure", and "I must succeed."
Those who are free from pride and arrogance, they can just do anything that they want, and they do their best in whatever they pursue, without thinking/considering about the possible outcome of success and failure, without fear towards failure or disappointment, and allowing the result/outcome to be what it is. They are not being determined by success and failure, or the outcome of their pursue. They understand that there is possibility of success and there is possibility of failure, and it's okay. If one just thinks about it but doesn't actually do it, then there is no possibility of achieving anything. This is nothing to do with self-confidence (faith and believing in oneself that one will be successful in everything that one wants to do and achieve) or confidence and faith towards anything that allows success in whatever people want to do or achieve.
If someone wants to be an architect, he or she needs to study architecture, and accumulates profound knowledge and develops understanding about architecture, and develops the specific skill that is required for being an architect. If someone has the interest in being an architect, but doesn't have the ability or talent to understand specific knowledge about architecture, or couldn't develop the required skill in being an architect, even after having enough knowledge about architecture, then even though one has intense self-confidence or high confidence about "I want to be an architect and I will be an architect for sure," but one couldn't become an architect due to some limitation. And it's okay. One can choose to do something else that is within one's ability, limitation and understanding, in the present moment. If after some time, the limitation that disallowed oneself to be an architect in the past have now changed for some reasons, where one can easily grasp the knowledge of architecture, or have no limitation to develop the required skill for being an architect, then one can pick up one's interest or ambition again. If it still doesn't work for some other reasons, it's okay.
It's the same as having expectation towards the outcome/result of one's action, by having intense self-confidence or high confidence strongly believing in oneself can do or achieve something successfully without failure, don't really change the outcome of one's action. It's either one do it, or not, and whether one gives one's best effort and full attention, or not, in the process of doing or achieving something. And whether the outcome/result is desirable, or not, it's nothing to do with the high or low expectation, and the high or low self-confidence and confidence.
It's the presence or absence of fear towards failure and disappointment, or the fear towards unable to do or achieve something due to pride and arrogance, and there is craving towards success/accreditation/acknowledgement/support and aversion towards failure/discredit/non-acknowledgement/losing support, that determining whether someone will be actually doing something and doing one's best to acquire the required knowledge and understanding, as well as being determined to be training and practicing the specific skill for doing something or achieving something, or not, without thinking about success and failure, without being determined by success and failure. One can be not successful in one's attempt to do or achieve something for some reasons, even after trying one's best with sufficient knowledge, understanding and skill for it, and it's okay.
For example, in any competitions.
One needs to have that specific talent, knowledge, correct understanding and skill in any particular type of competition, may it be something physical or mental, technical or artistic, or both. Upon having the specific talent, knowledge, correct understanding and skill, it requires lots of persistent but not excessive training and practicing to enhance the skill to the maximum, as well as be endowed with attention, focus, determination, perseverance, patience, forbearance, acceptance, adjustment, adaptation and accommodation in the process of training and practicing. Self-confidence and confidence has nothing to do with all these hard work, and doesn't change the outcome being what it is.
If the training or practice is not enough, if there is lack of attention, focus, determination, perseverance, patience, forbearance, acceptance, adjustment, adaptation and accommodation in the process of training and practicing, then it will influence the performance during the competition, for sure, even if oneself has intense self-confidence or high confidence about "I will win this competition and in all competitions," it doesn't work.
Those who understand, it's either win or loose/not winning in any competitions, and it's not that important, and will just do one's best and allow the result to be what it is. Maybe one's performance has been very good during training and practicing, but somehow, one's performance is not as good as it should be during the competition for some unexpected reasons, especially if it's a competition that requires team work or other people's coordination, and it's okay.
Sportsmanship, effort, attention, focus, non-expectation and acceptance are more useful and relevant than self-confidence or confidence and expectation in the process of training and practicing before the competition, and even more useful and relevant especially during the competition.
Another example, in crossing the road.
One needs to pay attention, and know to look out for any vehicles/cyclists/pedestrians/animals/objects coming from all directions and judge whether it's safe to cross the road at that timing, or not. One doesn't need to have self-confidence or confidence to cross the road. It's the presence or absence of fear that determines whether the person can cross the road calmly with the required attention and judgment of whether it's safe to cross at that timing, or not, as well as the patience to be waiting until it's safe to cross, even if the green light for the pedestrian crossing is on, as certain reckless irresponsible road users might not stop at the red light. By having strong self-confidence or confidence, or even intense faith in God, about "I can just cross the road anytime that I want and I don't need to pay attention or look out for any vehicles/cyclists/pedestrians/animals/objects coming from any directions, and nothing is going to happen on me," is mere ignorance.
For example, getting into a relationship.
By having strong self-confidence and high confidence in oneself doesn't determine that the person whom we love, will love us, or not, or want to be in a relationship with us, or not.
Some people say that they are not confident to love someone, or to be in a relationship with someone. But that is nothing to do with confidence, but it's actually fear towards being rejected, or aversion towards getting into a bad/difficult/problematic/failed relationship with the wrong person. Like anything else, one needs to know what is love and how to love before loving someone and getting into a relationship with someone, without hurting oneself and those whom one wants to love, and wants to be in a relationship with. Knowing what is love and how to love someone, is nothing to do with high or low self-confidence and confidence, but it's whether we know what is unconditional non-possessive desireless love, and know what is non-attachment, non-identification, non-craving, non-aversion and non-expectation, or not.
Last, but not least example, in giving birth.
Self-confidence and confidence is irrelevant in the labour process. Some
women don't have any knowledge about conceiving and nurturing a baby,
and doesn't have high self-confidence or confidence, but they still
deliver their babies like everyone else. Some women may have high
self-confidence or confidence towards delivering a healthy baby, but
things might not happen exactly the way that they think and anticipate how it should
be. Whether one is being a good mother, or not, is nothing to do with low or high self-confidence and confidence about "I am equipped with the knowledge and skill of being a good mother. I will be a good mother and I am a good mother." or "I don't know whether I will be a good mother, or not." It's about doing one's best to love unconditionally without attachment, possessiveness and expectation, and guiding the child wisely and compassionately, while learning and gaining experience throughout the entire process of bringing up a child.
No matter how strong is one's self-confidence believing in oneself, or has high confidence/faith towards God, the doctor/midwife and nurses, or being positive and optimistic, or how much knowledge about conceiving and nurturing a baby during pregnancy and after birth that one has, and has been planning a specific way to deliver the baby spiritually, efficiently or painlessly, or how well one has been preparing physically and mentally in delivering the baby, and still, it's not in one's control of how everything happens during the entire pregnancy, especially during the process of labour. Most women will say, it's so painful that one wouldn't think of anything else, about all the projection, preparation, anticipation or expectation, but just do one's best to deliver the baby safely within the shortest time as much as possible, minimizing the pain and any risk that endangering the safety of the mother and the baby, regardless of using whatever way that is most suitable at that time to deliver the baby to ensure the safety of the mother and the baby.
The process of learning and performing the yoga asana practice with the correct understanding is all about these. It's nothing to do with self-confidence or confidence in the process of learning or performing certain yoga asana poses, with the aspiration/expectation of "I can and will be able to do all these yoga asana poses perfectly." But, it's about being free from egoism of attachment, identification, desire of craving and aversion, judgment, comparison and expectation, on top of developing attention, focus, determination, perseverance, patience, forbearance, acceptance, adjustment, adaptation and accommodation, that allow the practitioner to keep trying and keep practicing until the practice comes to an end, upon Self-realization, without thinking about success and failure, or the outcome/result of the practice, without being determined by the ups and downs, pleasantness and unpleasantness, success and failure, what the body can do or cannot do, or what the mind knows and doesn't know during the entire process of learning and practicing.
More importantly, what the body can do or cannot do, and what the mind
knows and doesn't know, as well as how much benefits/goodness/enjoyment or unpleasantness/difficulty one has been receiving from the yoga asana practice, doesn't determine whether the mind will attain
Self-realization and be free from ignorance and suffering, or not. But
the perseverance and determination of keep practicing without
attachment, identification, craving, aversion, judgment, comparison and
expectation, the ability of letting go and allowing everything to be
what they are, as they are, and respecting all are impermanent, it doesn't matter after many years of practicing, the body still cannot perform many of the yoga asana poses, or whether can do all the poses comfortably/nicely, or not, will
leads the mind towards Self-realization.
There's no need of self-confidence and confidence in anything, especially in selflessness.
Inquire the truth of everything and be free.
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