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Monday, May 13, 2019

Selflessness?

Just like 'Self-inquiry' and 'Impermanence', 'Selflessness' is one of the common words we come across in the teachings of yoga and Buddhism.

The 'I', where there's a continuous stream of thinking/thought in the mind acknowledges as 'I' am an individual being with a physical body and thinking mind experiencing life, doesn't exist. Out of ignorance, there arise the idea of 'I' exist as part of the modification of the mind acknowledging as an individual being, attaching onto/possessing such and such qualities of names and forms to be identified/recognized as this is what/who 'I' am, claiming ownership towards the physical body and the thinking mind (this is my body and my mind) and all kinds of connection with everyone and everything that the mind comes in contact with (my family and my belongings and etc), and at the same time also identifying with the physical body and the thinking mind as 'I' (This physical body and this thinking mind is 'I').

'Selflessness' is not something to be attained by accumulating certain amount of 'merits and virtues' or 'good karma' after performing many 'good/righteous actions' or 'karma yoga/selfless service', but it's the 'realization' upon the mind seeing the truth of what is this 'I' where there's a thinking in the mind thinks and believes as 'I'. As long as there's an idea, acknowledgement and identification of "I am a selfless being performing good actions or karma yoga/selfless service" the mind is still functioning under the influence of egoism.

The mind needs to be free from egoism, impurities and restlessness to realize 'Selflessness', where there's no 'I' existing to enjoy or suffer, to be born or die, to know or don't know, to desire or don't desire, to be the performer of action and the receiver/enjoyer of the fruit of action, to be ignorant or be free from ignorance. It's just the modification of the thinking mind perceiving all the names and forms through the senses via the sense organs of the physical body. It's just the mind functioning and perceives, sees, hears, smells, tastes, feels, senses and thinks. There's no 'I' existing to claim possession/ownership/control of the selfless modification of the mind or the ceaseless impermanent changes of the modification of the mind perceiving all the names and forms that are also impermanent and selfless. It's coming from the mind being aware of the modification of the mind, while purifying and quieting itself to be free from restlessness, impurities and egoism, to be free from ignorance. It's not something else 'separated' from the mind called 'I' being there to be aware of 'my mind' or to purify and quiet 'my mind', to free 'my mind' from restlessness, impurities, egoism and ignorance.

"I am not the mind. The mind is not 'I'." is not about 'I' am an existing being/soul separated/distinct from the mind. The mind is just being what it is, functioning as it is selflessly, where there's no 'I' in the function of the mind which is supported/influenced by energy to be existing and functioning. Just like there's no 'I' in all the cells/bones/muscles/organs/systems that forming the entire structure of the physical body which depend on nature to provide support that allows the physical body to be existing and functioning. The body and mind constantly functioning or performing actions selflessly, and there are also the consequences of actions following the actions (cause and effect). But, somehow, out of ignorance, there's an idea of 'I' existing in the form of thinking claiming a personal identity and possession/ownership towards this and that, to desire and don't desire, to agree and disagree, to enjoy or suffer, to aspire and expect, and so on. There's an idea/identification of "I am the performer of my actions and I am the enjoyer of the fruit of my actions."

It's difficult/challenging for the egoistic mind that attached strongly onto a worldly self-identity attaching onto certain qualities of names and forms as this is 'I' or what 'I' am, to realize 'Selflessness'. The egoistic mind that 'possesses' a self-identity thinks and believes that 'I' exist as an individual being experiencing life, this is 'I', this is my life, my body, my mind, my thinking, my belief, my feelings, my emotion, my idea, my creativity, my energy, my health, my fitness, my strength, my flexibility, my ability, my disability, my achievement, my failure, my look, my talent, my knowledge, my education, my house, my belonging, my pet, my family, my friends, my relationship, my duty, my responsibility, my rights, my aspiration, my inspiration, my sacrifice, my happiness, my suffering, my vision, my desire, my actions, my fruit of actions, my religion, my 'God', my world, my country, and so on. Not only there's a personal identity, but there's also a group identity, such like our family, our life, our thinking, our belief, our culture, our religion, our 'God', our action, our fruit of action, our achievement, our failure, our world, our country, our vision, and so on.

"I eat, I drink, I play, I work, I rest, I aspire, I inspire, I think, I believe, I feel, I express, I laugh, I cry, I learn, I share, I give and receive, I love and beloved, I perceive, I experience, I act, I react, I achieve, I live, I die. I am existing. How can it be possible that 'I' don't exist?" It's unthinkable for the egoistic mind about 'Selflessness' - 'Egolessness' - 'I-lessness'.

That's why it's very essential for the mind to let go the attachment and identification towards any qualities of names and forms, especially the worldly conditioned egoistic way of thinking and belief in the mind that influence how the mind analyzes, judges, feels and reacts towards all and everything, as well as letting go attachment and identification towards the physical appearance/condition/ability/disability/achievement/non-achievement before the mind can reflect upon the truth of 'Selflessness'.

Once the mind is free from the attachment and identification towards the impermanent and selfless qualities of names and forms as 'I', including the function of the physical body and the thinking faculty, naturally the mind will realize the truth of 'itself' or 'the modification of the mind', that there's no 'I', knowing thyself. There's neither "I know" nor "I realize" nor "I am free from ignorance" nor "I am free."

As long as the mind is still mingling among the worldly passionate egoistic minds, that keep empowering/feeding the idea of 'I' and 'the world of egoism of all kinds of attachment and identification', it's very difficult and almost impossible for the mind to be free from ignorance and egoism. And hence, the important practice of renunciation, seclusion, solitude and silence.

According to the teachings of Swami Sivananda, the mind just needs to spend at least five to six years in seclusion and silence being away/cutting off from the worldly affairs/activities/society/family/friends/relatives/connections/interactions that feeds/empowers egoism/restlessness/impurities/ignorance, the mind will realize the truth of 'the mind perception of a worldly life existence of impermanent and selfless names and forms'. Although it doesn't guarantee that everyone who try to practice silence in seclusion and solitude for a prolonged period of time will be free from ignorance and attain self-realization, as the mind might still be influenced by gross and subtle egoistic worldly/spiritual attachment hindering the mind from seeing itself/knowing thyself. And not many people are suitable for such practice, as most passionate minds would 'go crazy' after being in seclusion and solitude for some time. Worldly passionate minds can't live or be without seeing/touching/communicating/interacting with other beings for even a short period of time, not to say for a prolonged period of time. That's why it requires certain degrees of dispassion and right discrimination for someone to practice silence in seclusion and solitude, to allow the mind to realize 'Selflessness'/'Oneness'/'Non-separateness'/'Namelessness'/'Formlessness', where 'suffering' and 'the end of suffering' doesn't exist.

Many people might understood 'Selflessness' as 'an existing name and form such as a being/soul/mind that is free from selfishness, who is unselfish', such as "I am a selfless/unselfish being/soul/mind", or "I am performing selfless action to benefit other beings and other beings will be benefited from my selfless actions."

If it's selfless, then what/who is that 'I' being there acknowledging and identifying as "I am selfless/unselfish"? It's just impermanent selfless function of the body and mind generating actions and the consequences of actions ceaselessly until the annihilation of the modification of the mind takes place, there's no 'I' being there to be acknowledging/identifying as "I am selfless/unselfish." or "I am good/bad." And hence, silent the mind, or as Swami Sivananda taught, "Kill the mind."

Selflessness is nothing to do with unselfishness. Regardless of living beings or non-living objects, all are impermanent and selfless or I-less, where there's no 'I' within all the impermanent changes. There's no 'I' existing to be identified as 'I am selfless', 'I am a selfless being', 'I am unselfish', 'I am performing selfless service and other beings are benefited from my selfless service', 'I am kind and compassionate', 'I aspire to inspire others to be selfless, kind and compassionate', and so on. There's no "I want to be selfless." or "I am becoming selfless."

'Selflessness' is the realization of there's no self or 'I', it's not about training the mind to become 'selfless' or 'unselfish'. None/nothing can train to become 'selfless', as there is no self or 'I' from the beginning. Everyone and everything is just selfless as it is. It's due to ignorance, there is the idea of 'I' arise in the thinking mind materializing itself via egoism influencing the thinking pattern of the mind, where the idea of 'I' feeds on attachment, identification, desire of craving and aversion, judgment, comparison and expectation, to desire and don't desire, to aspire and expect, to enjoy and suffer, to love and be loved, to be continuing 'existing' in the form of thinking possessing a worldly self-identity with certain qualities of names and forms.

The idea of 'I' can be annihilated by eliminating egoism from the mind. As the 'I' appears to be 'real and existing' is nothing but the thinking pattern of the mind functioning under the influence of egoism, and upon annihilation of egoism or the veil of ignorance, the idea of 'I' will vanish naturally.

Upon the realization of impermanence and selflessness, naturally the mind also realizes 'timelessness'. Time doesn't exist, it's just 'what the mind perceives', and 'both the mind (the perceiver) and what the mind perceives (the perceived)' constantly changing, and the ceaseless impermanent changes as well as due to the function of memory, there's remembrance towards the impermanent changes generate the false impression of 'time' or 'I'. The mind is going through countless births and deaths of ceaseless thoughts arising and passing away generating the different states of the mind. The body is going through countless births and deaths along with all the impermanent changes that are happening in the physical body generating the different condition/appearance of the body. The mind and the body is never remain the same mind or the same body even for a moment until the body and the thinking faculty ceased functioning and existing.

There's no "I am performing yoga practice. I am a yoga practitioner. I will be receiving the benefits of the yoga practice. I am free or not free from ignorance." It's just the mind performing the practice, and whether the mind will be free from ignorance, or not.

Be free.

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Know thyself. Everything is impermanent and selfless. There is no 'I'. There is no 'I am selfless'/'I am not selfless'. There is no 'I am hurt'/'I need to be healed from hurt'. Non-blind believing, non-blind following, non-blind practicing and non-blind propagating, but be open-minded to inquire the truth of everything. Be free. Be peaceful. Be happy.

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