be free, be happy, be peaceful

May all find the teacher within to guide oneself towards unconditional love and peace

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Go beyond the sense of meaninglessness and meaningfulness

As long as the mind is still swaying in between the sense of meaninglessness and meaningfulness, rejecting the sense of meaninglessness and longing for the sense of meaningfulness, know that this is due to ignorance and egoism, and this mind is not free.

The ignorant egoistic mind is determined by the existence and non-existence of certain qualities of names and forms that generates either the sense of meaninglessness or the sense of meaningfulness. The mind recognizes and labels certain qualities of names and forms as 'meaningful' or 'meaningless', and has craving/longing towards what the mind recognizes and labels as 'meaningfulness' and has aversion towards what the mind recognizes and labels as 'meaninglessness'.

For the mind that is not free from ignorance and egoism, there will always be the perception of the sense of meaninglessness towards the existence or the absence of certain qualities of names and forms, which leads to the longing for the sense of meaningfulness that the mind thinks it can be found in certain qualities of names and forms, with the intention to be free from the sense of meaninglessness.

There's nothing wrong with enjoying and appreciating all the nice experiences that make us feel good and happy, and the companionship of nice people who are nice to us, who like and agree with us, who are like-minded as us, who share the similar thinking, belief and values. But, what happen when all these nice experiences and the companionship of the people whom we like and want to be with are not available to us or are absent for a period of time? The mind feels dissatisfied, disappointed, unhappy, depressed and meaningless. The mind misses all the nice experiences and companionship of people whom the mind likes and wants to be with and interact with. The mind experiences suffering. This mind is not free, even if this is a good mind with good behavior and good will.

Realize yoga, be liberated from ignorance and egoism, there's neither meaninglessness nor meaningfulness.

One enjoys and appreciates all the nice experiences and the companionship of other people who are like-minded, but one doesn't miss anything or anyone when all these names and forms are not existing/available. One doesn't miss any objects of names and forms of the senses of sights, sounds, smells, tastes, sensations or thoughts, that the mind likes and agrees with. One doesn't miss any activities that one would enjoy doing. One doesn't miss any particular interaction or connection with anyone. One doesn't miss anyone whom one loves and cares for. One doesn't miss any 'good' things and 'happy' experiences that are not existing/available, that are absent in the present moment, or infinitely.

By advising other people who feel meaninglessness in life to do or achieve something that will give them the sense of meaningfulness doesn't help them to be free. It is not the teachings or practice of yoga.

Whenever the mind finds the sense of meaningfulness in certain objects or actions or experiences, may it be teaching yoga to other people, or the accomplishment in yoga practice, or doing charity works, or contribution to the less fortunate ones, or doing certain things that one feels accomplishment and satisfaction, or being treated with respect, love and kindness by other people, or living a higher quality of life, or having an intense faith towards 'God' or particular belief and practice, then know that this mind is not free. The mind that is free, is aware of all the perception of different qualities of names and forms, but there's no sense of meaninglessness or meaningfulness existing. There's no longing or missing towards something that the mind perceives as 'good' and 'meaningful'.

All the names and forms are impermanent (good or bad, meaningless or meaningful), and the liberated mind is not determined by any 'good' or 'bad', 'meaningless' or 'meaningful' actions or experiences or objects of names and forms, to be existing, to feel meaningless or meaningful.

This realization/liberation derives from the persist practice of silence being in solitude and seclusion for a prolonged period of time.

Be free.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

The importance of renouncing worldly life for those who want to realize yoga

Renunciation is an important part of yoga sadhana for those who are aware of the consequences of ignorance and egoism in oneself, who sincerely want to realize yoga to be free from ignorance and suffering. Those who just want to do some yoga exercise to gain some benefits to look good and feel good about oneself, who enjoy being passionate towards worldly life and social activities, who think ignorance doesn't exist in them, they don't have to follow the path of renunciation.

After learning and practicing yoga for some years having developed a certain degrees of non-attachment and correct understanding of the teachings and practice of yoga, yoga practitioners who want to realize yoga will have to eventually renounce the worldly life and retreat into solitude and seclusion for a prolonged period of time.

This is not about going for a short term of a few days or few weeks of yoga retreat holidays where people indulge in yoga related activities that they enjoy doing, that make people feel good and meaningful, spending time being with people who are like-minded, connecting and interacting with people who share the same ideas and values, while being able to stay connected and interacting with family and friends and the world, but it's about renouncing the worldly life of all sorts of relationships with people or animals or things and social activities, and retreating into solitude and seclusion for at least 5 - 6 years. Allow everyone and everything to be what they are, as they are, without interference with anyone or anything expecting/wishing them to be the way that we think they should be.

Renunciation from worldly life or retreating into solitude and seclusion for a prolonged period of time might be perceived by many people, including those who think they love yoga and are practicing yoga, as 'running away from life or the world', or 'being selfish and uncaring' towards family, friends and the society, as most minds are being conditioned by worldly thinking and belief of a strong attachment and identification towards certain values of life consist of family and friends, social interactions and worldly affairs.

Our worldly life consists of all relationships and things and activities is what we think is what we are, and we take all these names and forms to be the highest value/meaning of life existence (family and friends, culture and spirituality or religion, what we do or don't do, what we have or don't have, what we achieve and don't achieve, and what we contribute or don't contribute to the society). For many people, it's 'wrong', 'bad', 'inappropriate', 'inhuman', 'selfish' and 'crazy' to not connecting or interacting with family and friends, or the society. And it's okay. Everyone has the freedom for how they perceive and understand and think about everything.

But this is also why people perceive/experience all kinds of suffering in this worldly life existence. And it's okay, because people rather choose to go through suffering than to find out how to be free from suffering.

We might not like suffering and we don't want suffering or what we think and believe as 'wrong' or 'bad', but we are not aware of the root cause of all suffering, and we don't like or disagree with the teaching/practice that will lead us to realize the cause of suffering and how to be free from suffering, due to deep rooted ignorance and egoism.

At one moment, we feel good, happy, meaningful and contented when things are the way that we like it to be or how we think it should be, when our wishes and desires are being gratified. At another moment, we feel hurt, annoyed, frustrated, agitated, disappointed, dissatisfied, upset, unhappy, angry, hating, fear and worry when things are not the way that we like it to be or how we think it should be, when our wishes and desires are not being gratified. And we tell ourselves and others that this is life, this is human nature, this is normal for all human beings. But then, whether intentionally or unintentionally, we constantly do and say things that would cause damage and disharmony in oneself and in the world, out of hurt, annoyance, frustration, agitation, disappointment, dissatisfaction, upset, unhappiness, anger, hatred, animosity, fear and worry.

Whether we like and agree with it, or not, the entire practice of yoga is about the annihilation of egoism of attachment, identification and the desires of craving and aversion, to free the mind from impurities, to be free from ignorance, to transcend suffering.

Although one has been doing yoga practice for a long time and has heard about selflessness, but one cannot realize yoga (selflessness), if one doesn't work on freeing the mind from the egoistic attachment and identification with the worldly life existence as 'I', 'This is who and what I am', 'This is my body', 'This is my mind', 'This is my thinking/belief/culture/religion/ethnicity', 'This is my life', 'This is my family', 'These are my children', 'These are my friends', 'These are my brothers and sisters', 'This is where I belonged', 'This is my country', and 'This is my world'. All these names and forms are just what they are, they are impermanent, they don't belong to 'I', and they are not 'I'.

The ego constantly straining the body and the mind expecting the body and mind to be like this or like that, to be able to do this or that, to be able to achieve what 'I' like and what 'I' want. 'I' want my body and my mind to be like this, 'I' don't like them to be like that. 'I' want my body and my mind to be able to do this and achieve that. And we think we love our body and mind, but we don't. We just want the body and the mind to gratify all my desires or wishes of what I like and what I want.

When one realized yoga or selflessness, there's no separateness of 'I' and what the mind perceives as 'my family', 'my friends', 'my brothers and sisters', and so on. There's no 'We are one big family', 'We are all human beings', or 'We are connected together'. There's no 'we'.

Connection exists only when there is still the perception of separateness of different individuals, that two or more separate objects/particles/souls/beings connect together. Connection doesn't exist in oneness, or non-separateness. When there is connection, there is disconnection. It is still within the perception of duality. And the main teaching and practice of yoga is to realize non-duality, or oneness, or non-separateness. One doesn't need to stay connected with any other beings to feel that we are connected to each other.

Those who really want to know what is yoga, they will realize it when the mind experiences complete silence being in solitude and seclusion, being cut off from the worldly life of all relationships with everyone and everything, and worldly objects and activities that the mind loves and familiars with, for a prolonged period of time.

We like to say we love yoga and we think we have been practicing yoga for a long time, and we feel satisfied, confident, good and happy when our body becomes stronger and more flexible and is able to do many of the yoga asana poses that we want to be able to do, but then we would give ourselves many 'reasonable' excuses about why we don't need or don't want to renounce worldly life to cut off all the tendencies of all kinds of attachment, clinging, longing and craving.

Some yoga practitioners would have no difficulty to perform their daily routine of yoga asana and pranayama practice regularly, and gaining great improvement in physical health and fitness level, strength and flexibility and skill to perform many of the yoga asana poses, and attaining momentary good and happy feelings, sense of self-worth, confidence and meaningfulness in the mind due to the effects and achievements from performing the yoga practice regularly, being able to live the life that they want, but not many are interested in observing complete silence in solitude and seclusion for a prolonged period of time, to be isolated from people and things that they love and the worldly life and activities that they are familiar with. The ego needs to feel loved and be connected with the world, to feel good, happy, confident, or meaningful.

Some people will have no difficulty to go into a silent retreat centre for a few weeks, and stop connecting and interacting with other people and stop doing the activities that they like to do for that few weeks, as they know this is just a very short term restriction, but when the mind has to go through a prolonged period of time being cut off from people and things and activities that they love and like, there will be pain/suffering arise in the mind.

Meanwhile, some people might think that they have developed a good foundation of non-attachment and detachment, because they can let go certain things in life, but most probably that is because the mind has found some other new attachment to cling onto, such like new friends, or new relationships, or 'new toys' to play with, or new activities to do in life.

While some people love to go for weeks and months of 'yoga retreat', but know that most of the yoga retreats in the world are not about silencing the mind, but it is about living with a community that are like-minded, doing activities and interacting with other people who share the similar ideas and values, which makes the ego feels comfortable, good, happy and meaningful, but this doesn't help the mind to be free from ignorance and egoism.

Only when the mind can live in solitude and seclusion for a prolonged period of time, when the mind no longer needs to attach onto any beings or objects or activities to feel loved and connected, to feel good, happy, confident and meaningful about itself and life existence and the world, then this being can live and mix freely in the society, love everyone and everything unconditionally, care for humanity and benefit the world efficiently. There's no loneliness, boredom, longing, clinging, craving, dissatisfaction, incompleteness, emptiness, void, meaninglessness, or fear in this mind.

"Do good to others, help others, give love and care to others, because it is meaningful and it makes us feel good and happy for being able to do good and give help, love and care to others." - This is not the teaching of yoga at all. This is the ego needs to attach onto certain qualities of names and forms to feel good and happy and meaningful about itself and life existence. This is empowering the ego. It's not freedom. The one who is free from the ego, simply just do good, just give help, love and care to others, NOT because 'I' want to or need to feel good and happy and meaningful about myself and my life for being able to do good, to give help, love and care to others.

The minds that are free from ignorance and egoism remain equanimous, peaceful and kind towards all beings without discrimination under any difficult conditions, situations and circumstances. These minds don't need to renounce worldly life to retreat into solitude and seclusion, as they are free from egoism of attachment, identification, desires and impurities, and they are undisturbed/undetermined by all the perceptions of good and bad qualities of names and forms, and hence being free from all kinds of disturbs or suffering. These minds don't need to display any yoga asana poses through the physical body to show that they are practicing yoga.

Be free.

Monday, March 13, 2017

The importance of self-inquiry and investigation of the truth of everything

Many people would have doubt towards something that are different from their own thinking and belief, or that are unknown/unfamiliar to them, but they don't bother to investigate the truth of the existing thinking and belief in them that has been influencing how they perceive, act, react, behave and feel about all and everything. Different people perceive different reality in the same world due to the different thinking and belief in everyone. And it's okay, as long as everyone keeps their own thinking, belief, perception of reality and their own opinion/point of view to themselves, and respect other people's thinking, belief, perception of everything and opinion/point of view that are being different from theirs. But how many people would keep their perception of everything and point of view to themselves, without interfering with other people's different perception of reality and opinion/point of view?

And hence, all kinds of disagreement, argument, fighting, conflict, discrimination, prejudice and unequal rights/treatments arise in the society, and then it turns into unrest, fear, offensiveness, defensiveness, animosity, hatred, abuse, bully, violence and war among people, areas and countries.

Never underestimate the power of ignorance and egoism.

Even the most educated, intelligent, knowledgeable, talented and skillful people in the world also might not be free from ignorance and egoism.

If it's coming from somewhere, like religious books, school books, philosophical books and history books, written, edited and published by such and such famous writers, editors and publishers, or if it's coming from certain people, like our parents, or elders, or school teachers, or religious teachers, or spiritual teachers, or famous teachers, or famous personalities and celebrities, or whom we think are good people, or our good friends, or our group leaders, or the leaders of a country or the world, or anyone whom we think they deserve respect and trust, then it must be true, and in order to show respectfulness, faith and loyalty, we shall not question the truth of it.

Out of nowhere or somewhere, for no reason or some reasons, someone created and told a story to some others many hundreds or thousands years ago, and the story was passed down from generations to generations, from places to places, and without any hesitation, people would believe that this story must be true, because it has been passing down through many generations to us, and many people from many places believe it's true, and so, it must be true then.

Investigate the truth of the teachings of yoga, or all kinds of religious teachings, or all kinds of cultural and spiritual beliefs, or all kinds of philosophies of mankind. Do not blind-believing or blind-following any teachings from anyone and anywhere. Do not teach or preach any teachings to others just because that was what we were told by our teachers and from the books, or it has been existing since many hundreds or thousands years ago.

This is different from someone being skeptical and defensive all the time, being peaceless from having fear towards trusting anyone, or being unable to trust anyone or anything. Seeing the truth as it is has nothing to do with trusting anyone or anything, or not. There is no fear of being mistrusted anyone or anything, but merely seeing the truth of things as it is, without judgment or expectation based on any particular thinking and belief about what is 'true' and 'untrue', 'right' and 'wrong', or 'good' and 'bad'.

The truth is still what it is, and it doesn't get hurt and wouldn't be damaged, whether we know or don't know about it, whether we think we can or should 'trust' or 'distrust' it, and whether we like and agree with it, or not.

The teacher of truth finding doesn't want anyone to 'trust' or 'distrust' him or his teachings. He doesn't want anyone to believe and follow him. He doesn't want to eliminate or change any of the existing thinking and belief in the world. He only advises everyone to purify one's mind and inquire the truth of everything to attain self-realization. He doesn't condemn or punish anyone who doesn't follow his advice at all or doesn't follow his advice as it is. Contemplate on this and be free.

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Let go the ego

The ego constantly expects or looks for acceptance, love, care, kindness, support, recognition, approval, acknowledgement, attention, companionship, friendship, interaction, cooperation, encouragement, appreciation, praise and compliment, or anything that make the ego feels good, confident, proud and meaningful about itself from other people, or the group that it thinks it belongs to, or the society, or the world.

This ego will hurt itself and/or others if it doesn't get what it's looking for, thinking and believing that all its unhappiness, disappointment, dissatisfaction, frustration, anger and hurt are caused by other people's bad and wrong behavior, or unkind, uncaring, unloving and unsupportive reaction and treatment, or inappreciation, or criticism, or unfriendliness, or selfishness, and so on.

Let go this ego. Be free from all these 'unnecessary' attachment, longing, clinging, expectation, craving and aversion.

The mind that is free from the ego doesn't need acceptance, love, support, recognition, approval, acknowledgement, attention, companionship, friendship, interaction, cooperation, encouragement, appreciation, praise and compliment from anyone, or any group, or the society, or the world, to feel good, confident, proud or meaningful. The mind is free as it is, peaceful as it is.

No one can free other people's minds from the ego. It has to come from within willingly and determinedly to let go the ego, the root cause of all 'suffering' and 'problems' of humanity.

No one is obliged to be kind, caring and loving to one another. Allow everyone to show love, care and kindness, or not. It's the attachment and expectation towards the worldly thinking and idea about "Human should be like this or like that, and shouldn't be like this or like that" that generates great disappointment in us towards what we think is 'bad', 'wrong', or 'inhumanity'. But what we think is 'bad', 'wrong', or 'inhumanity' has no power to disappoint anyone. Be free.

The ego is also the one who wants to feel being 'wanted' or 'needed' by others, that there are people want me or need me, that 'I' am good enough, that 'I' am able to give love and care or inspiration and motivation to others, which give a sense of pride and meaningfulness to itself. Otherwise, the ego will feel bad and meaningless about itself, thinking and feeling that it is unneeded or unwanted by others, that it is not good enough, that no body wants or needs love and care or inspiration and motivation from it.

Once the mind is free from the ego, one can love and care for others unconditionally, without identification and attachment towards the action of giving love and care to others or the result of the action. There's no expectation that people should be grateful and appreciative, or should show us love and care in return. One doesn't need other people's love and care and appreciation to feel loved, worthy or meaningful. One doesn't need to feel loved, worthy or meaningful, at all. There's no fear of being unloved, unworthy or meaninglessness. One does good to others, and loves and cares for others not because it will make 'me' feel good about 'myself' or expecting to receive love and care in return. And that is liberation.

Be kind, but don't expect other people also be kind.

Be loving, but don't expect other people also be loving.

Do good and don't do bad, but don't expect other people also do good and don't do bad.

Drive with attentiveness and following the rules, but don't expect other drivers also drive with attentiveness and following the same rules.

Love and peace to all.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Be strong?

One doesn't need to be strong or stay strong.

One just needs to embrace and accept oneself as one is.

Sometimes we think we are strong or strong enough, while sometimes we think we are not strong or not strong enough, and it's okay. We don't have to be strong at all, and we don't have to be able to stay strong all the time.

Sometimes there are things that the body or the mind can do or achieve, while sometimes there are things that the body or the mind can't do or achieve, and it's okay. The body and the mind don't have to be able to do or achieve all and everything all the time.

Most important, there is no attachment or identification with what the egoistic impure mind thinks and perceives about itself and/or others.

Whether the mind thinks 'I' am strong or not strong, and whether the body and the mind are able to do or achieve anything and everything, or not, all these qualities are impermanent, and it's not who we think we are. It's just the ego.

The ego is the one who enjoys and suffers, who wants that and doesn't want this, and who feels satisfy or dissatisfy, happy or unhappy, fulfilled or disappointed, calm or disturbed, love or hate, and who feels hurt, offended, insulted, humiliated, disrespected, annoyed, frustrated, threatened, insecure, oppressed, discriminated, belittled, lonely, meaningless, low self-esteem, unconfident, doubt, guilty, regret, shameful, and so on. It is the one who needs to possess or attach onto certain qualities of names and forms to feel good, proud, confident and meaningful about itself and life. It is the one who would do anything that might hurt the body and the mind and others in order to attain or fulfill or protect all its desires of want and doesn't want, or craving and aversion.

One just do one best within one's ability, making use of the present condition and ability of the body and the mind, to do and achieve what is possible, and let go what is impossible in the present moment, being free from egoism of attachment, identification, craving, aversion, judgment and expectation.

It is the ego that wants to be strong and stay strong. It is the ego that wants the body and the mind to be able to do and achieve all and everything that it desires. It is the ego that wants to believe that everything is possible and nothing is impossible.

Be free from this ego. Be kind to the body and the mind, by embracing and accepting the body and the mind as they are. They don't have to be good all the time. They don't have to be perfect or to be the way that the ego would like them to be. It is okay that sometimes there are things that are possible and sometimes there are things that are impossible. Such like, it is impossible to undo the past, or to control everything to be the way that the ego likes it to be. And it's okay.

It's just the ego that needs to achieve and attach onto some qualities of names and forms that it likes and wants (what it thinks and believes as good, positive, happiness, success and meaningful), and rejecting the qualities of names and forms that it doesn't like and doesn't want (what it thinks and believes as bad, negative, unhappiness, failure and meaningless). Be free from this ego, there's no need to depend on good qualities, good conditions, good abilities, good achievements, good results, good relationships, good life, good reputation, good image, good feelings, positive feedback, support and acknowledgement, to be peaceful, to be happy, to be confident, or to feel meaningful about the worldly life existence, or what we think is 'I'. There is no 'I'.

Be free from this ego, there's no 'I' being strong or not strong. There's no need to be strong. There's no need to be confident. There's no need to feel meaningful. It doesn't matter how is the world and how is life and whatever experiences we go through from birth to death in this life existence, there is peace, right here and now. And this is liberation.

Liberation is not about fighting, changing and eliminating what we think is bad, evil, unjust, inequality and wrong in the world. Whatever we think is bad, evil, unjust, inequality and wrong in the world, is the product/consequence of ignorance and egoism in all beings, including those who think they are good and right, who think they are better than others and deserve better treatments from others. None can fight or change or eliminate ignorance and egoism in other beings, to change or control the world to be the way that we think is all good, evil-less, just, equal and right. Not even Buddha or any Gurus can change or remove ignorance and egoism of others.

Liberation is being free from ignorance and egoism in one's mind. One will be peaceful as one is, which is nothing to do with whether the world and our life experience is all good, evil-less, just, equal and right, or not. It's being undisturbed and undetermined by the products/consequences of other people's ignorance and egoism.

Thursday, March 9, 2017

Certificates for running and attending yoga courses?

Issuing and acquiring 'Certificates' for running and attending yoga courses are not yoga practice.

Yoga is nothing to do with 'certification', 'certificate', 'yoga alliance', 'yoga association', and so on.

All these names and forms are the products of ignorance, egoism, worldly ideas of identity, values, recognition, acknowledgment, fruit of actions, self/professional image and commercialism.

One doesn't need certificates to have peace and compassion, or to forbear and forgive, or to love all beings unconditionally, or to show or guide other beings towards peace and compassion.

Having many 'internationally recognized certifications' from attending yoga courses affiliated with 'yoga alliance', or having all the knowledge/information about different types of yoga practice and knowing how to perform all the different types of yoga practice, doesn't mean that we are, or will be free from ignorance and egoism and suffering. It doesn't guarantee that one is peaceful and compassionate, or be able to show or guide other beings towards peace and compassion.

We won't find certificates in self-realization of the truth.

We won't find certificates in silence of the mind.

We won't find certificates in selflessness and liberation from suffering.

Be free.


Sunday, March 5, 2017

Let go attachment, identification and expectation in all relationships

If we truly love those who are in all kinds of relationships with us, whom we think we love, and if we love them, we will wish everyone be peaceful and be happy while being in the relationships with us, then we need to let go attachment, identification and expectation towards ourselves, the relationships and the people in the relationships with us. Otherwise, whether intentionally or unintentionally, we will keep hurting ourselves and everyone whom we think we love, who are in a form of relationship/connection with us. There's no love. There's only possessiveness and endless selfish desires (towards the people whom we think we love and the relationships we have with everyone) waiting to be gratified.

Especially in love relationships, if a person truly loves us, we don't need to say or do anything to expect or control this person's behavior so that he or she will not or shall not do anything that is unkind or unloving or hurtful to us. If a person would do something that is unkind or unloving or hurtful to us, out of selfish desires, dissatisfaction, greed and lust, whether within or without our knowledge, then this person doesn't love us, even though this person thinks he or she loves us, and we love and care for this person very much, because this person doesn't even love himself or herself. They only love what they like and want (desires). In this case, we can let this person and the relationship with this person go, even though we love this person, but we don't have to be in a relationship with this person who doesn't love us or appreciate us. And more importantly, it's that we won't feel hurt by this person's unkind, unloving or hurtful behavior if we truly love this person as he is, as she is. We wish him or her love and peace, and let him or her go to chase after their desires that they like and want, which they can't get (enough) from being in a relationship with us. Meanwhile, we are happy and peaceful and live life meaningfully as we are, because we don't depend on other people's love and kindness or any relationships to make us feel happy or meaningful about ourselves and our life existence.

If we think we love this person very much, and we reluctant to let go this person and this relationship, but, at the same time we feel disturbed and hurt by this person's unkind, unloving and hurtful behavior, then this is our own responsibility, as we don't want to let go. This also means that we don't love this person either, we only love what we like and want, and we only want to possess this person to be 'mine', and to possess this person's love and the relationship with this person. We want him or her to behave in certain ways. We want our relationship with him or her to be in certain ways. We want him or her to love and treat us in certain ways. It's all about what we like and want. And when we don't get what we like and want, but we are getting what we don't like and don't want, or when what we like and want has changed into something that we don't like and don't want, or we are losing what we like and want, we feel disturbed and hurt, disappointed and angry. It's not because the person in the relationship with us is not loving or unkind, or their behavior is bad and wrong that is hurting us, or has the power to hurt us. It's our own attachment, identification and expectation that hurts our ego, which is unnecessary.

This is the same as in all our relationships with everyone and everything, whether it's with family, siblings, parents, children, friends, society, things, and the world that we live in. We think we love this and that. We think we love the world that we live in. And we constantly feel disturbed and hurt, disappointed and angry when people and things that we love, or the world that we love, are not the way that we like or want it to be. It's merely ignorance and egoism.

Be free, whether we have any kind of relationship with anyone, or not, and whether the relationships we have with everyone are good and long lasting, or not. There's no attachment, identification or expectation. There's no unfulfilled desires, dissatisfaction, disappointment, anger, hatred, jealousy, hurts, guilt, fear and worry.

Allow everyone to love us and be kind to us, and to be in a relationship with us, or not. Love everyone as they are, even though they don't love us, or they are unkind to us, or they don't want to be in a relationship (anymore) with us.

Be free.

Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Friendliness is about respecting everyone to be different from oneself, to be what they are, as they are

Friendliness doesn't necessarily mean making social contacts or personal friendships and hanging out together, connecting, interacting and socializing with other like-minded people. It is about respecting everyone, whom we know or don't know, to be different from oneself, to be what they are, as they are, being free from discrimination, judgment, expectation, superiority/inferiority and self-righteousness.

Those who are open-minded and free from egoism will not interfere with other people's thinking and belief that are different from them, and won't be disturbed or offended by other people's thinking and belief that one doesn't like and doesn't agree with, and have peace and harmony in oneself. And they allow other people to dislike or disagree with their thinking and belief, being undisturbed and not be offended or insulted by other people's dislike and disagreement towards oneself. But not many are open-minded and egoless. Lots of conflict, argument and violence derived from closed-minded and egoistic mind reactions towards what the ego doesn't like and doesn't agree with, being disturbed and offended by one's dislike and disagreement towards other people's thinking and belief that is different from oneself, or be disturbed and offended or insulted by other people's dislikes and disagreements towards one's thinking and belief which one thinks is right, or true, or superior.

Putting the blame onto other people's thinking and belief and behavior that our minds think and believe as wrong and bad, that we don't like and don't agree with, for the peacelessness and disharmony in us, is ignorance. It's how the ego reacts towards something that it doesn't like and doesn't agree with, that causes the peacelessness and disharmony in the mind.

In yoga or Buddhism, friendliness is the ability to be able to be aware of all the different qualities of names and forms in different people or beings, and be able to respect everyone as they are, even though we might not like or agree with them of their thinking, their beliefs, or their behavior, without judgment or criticism, without trying to change or control those whom we dislike or disagree with to be what we would like them to be, or to be the way that we think they should be. Instead, we have self-awareness, self-discipline and self-control over our own thoughts, actions and speech, being free from discrimination or prejudice that based on our personal likes and dislikes or agreements and disagreements influenced by our own personal thinking and belief about what things are and how things should be like.

One can keep one's personal thinking and belief as well as what one practices or doesn't practice to oneself, and allows other people or beings to have their own thinking and belief, and what they practice or don't practice that are different from oneself, without interfering with other people's freedom of thinking, actions and speech, even if their thinking, actions and speech might cause disturbs or harmful damages to themselves and other beings. But, allowing everyone to develop self-awareness, self-discipline and self-control over their own thoughts, actions and speech via self-realization for the well-being of themselves and others.

The pride and arrogance towards 'I' am better and more superior than all the others is why the ego constantly judging and criticizing and interfering with other people or beings that one doesn't like and doesn't agree with. The thinking and belief of 'I' am good and right, 'I' want the world to be good and right, 'I' want other people to be good and right, 'I' should correct these people or beings whom 'I' think they are not good and wrong, whom I think their thinking and belief and behavior are inferior than mine, is merely coming from the ego, it's not the teachings or the practice of yoga.

In yoga and Buddhism, if one truly wants to do good and be good and wants the world to be good, one focuses and works diligently on self-inquiry by taming and quieting one's mind through self-discipline and self-control, to be determined to free one's mind from ignorance and egoism, and allows everyone to be what they are, as they are, and allows the world to be what it is, as it is. If everyone knows this and frees their minds from ignorance and egoism, the world will be free from all kinds of discrimination, prejudice, hatred, jealousy, greed, possessiveness, fear, exploitation, conflict, war, or violence. All these affliction arise due to people want to interfere with other people's thinking, belief and behavior that one doesn't like and doesn't agree with.

Find out what really happens when there is conflict or argument or unrest between two people? May it be between the parents and their children, the husband and the wife, two friends, two strangers, two neighbours, two religions, two communities, or two countries. It's all deriving from ignorance and egoism and impurities of dissatisfaction, disappointment, anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, possessiveness, exploitation, selfish desires and expectations, feelings of hurt and insult, pride and arrogance, offensiveness and defensiveness, or fear and worry. It's not because one party is 'good and right' and the other party is 'bad and wrong'. If either one party is truly 'good and right', there's no conflict or argument at all. There will be peace and harmony in oneself even when the mind perceives and is aware of something is 'not good or wrong' based on the thinking and belief in one's mind.

If people want to believe or disbelieve in God, that's everyone's freedom.

Be truly friendly. Only when one knows what is true friendliness, one will also know what is compassion. Or else, even though one talks about and promotes compassion, and wants to be compassionate, but one couldn't be truly compassionate if one's mind isn't free from ignorance and egoism yet.

Be free.

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About Yoga

Know thyself. There is no existence of 'I'. Everything is impermanent. Be free, be peaceful, be happy.

Om shanti

About Me

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Pantai Cenang, Langkawi, Kedah, Malaysia
My husband and I run ongoing yoga retreats in Langkawi Malaysia. We teach traditional Hatha Yoga - a combination of Asanas (postures) and Pranayama (breathing techniques) and relaxation, that has given benefit to millions of practitioners over thousands of years. Our yoga studio is situated in Langkawi. We also run yoga retreats in Europe and India.

Link to Yoga Now Malaysia website

Link to Yoga Now Malaysia website
Yoga retreats and yoga workshops in Malaysia

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